I'm Alan Olga and this is Clear and Vivid, conversations about connecting and communicating.

Julien, I built a laboratory at the University of Washington where 130 newlywed couples just

occupied an apartment kind of setting where they could move around very freely and we studied

them for 24 hours.

I had the cameras going for 24 hours.

Also collecting urine samples, we were collecting blood and so on.

So it was more detailed physiological measures than what we had done before.

We found that the couples who were more physiologically aroused,

these hearts were beating faster, as blood were flowing faster and so on,

had relationships that deteriorated over time.

And that was the basic finding.

So the people who were calmer when they talked to one another and interacted with one another,

had relationships that got better and better over time.

That's John and Julie Gottman.

For decades they've been studying couples and what they call the love lab.

What they've discovered there is helping thousands of other couples strengthen their relationships

and as I discovered in reading their new book, The Love Prescription,

even a person that's been in a relationship lasting over 65 years, a person like me can get better at communicating.

This is great to be talking with you both because this podcast is about communicating and relating

and your stars in the field of relationships.

John, the thing that I really love about your work is that you created an environment

where you could study relating and relationships and measure what you were studying.

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