Last week on Thomas in the Bible, Thomas incorrectly figures that Googling the Bible is more interesting than listening to him read it, but he soldiers on for his patrons.

Jesus visits a mountain of olives, then stops a woman from getting stoned.

He confuses the phareses by...

The pharises?

He confuses by channeling Gullam and escapes before getting stoned himself.

Next on Tap, he cures a blind man, which, as is typical, doesn't impress the Jews

because they don't believe in miracles.

We finish up with more confusing talk about doors and sheep,

and a final escape from stoning by slipping off to Jordan,

with a verily, verily count of five, a yawn count of one, and a cool outro tune by Marcel.

Ah, verily, verily count. That's good. I like it. And it's Pharisees, right? Did I, tell if you're making fun of something I said or if you, yeah, it should be Pharisees, I think. Is that what you're saying with the Pharisees or whatever? Anyway, we're on John. We're going to read to from 11 to 14. Might be a bit of a longer episode, actually, reading-wise, but

we'll see. Maybe I'll knock it out even faster. Speed read. No. I owe you guys a nice,

low, methodical read. Now, a certain man was sick named Lazarus of Bethany, the town of Mary and her sister Martha.

It was that Mary which anointed the Lord with ointment and wiped his feet with her hair.

Find anything but other than that. I didn't see, I don't know if that was this book or one

of the million other times we've read it because we read the same thing over and over.

But I do remember someone washing his feet, but I don't remember a part where she wiped his feet with her hair.

First off, what does that do?

I don't think hair like on your head is that great, especially a woman's hair if it's, like, longer.

How's it, it's not really going to wipe very well. I mean, I could be wrong. Secondly, it just,

it doesn't really seem like it's fixing anything. I mean, then you just need to wash your hair,

right? And then what are you going to wipe that on? I would use anything but that.

...