Joe Wilkinson - The Sue Pollard (Part 1)

The Moon Under Water

Audio Always

Food, Comedy, Arts, Comedy Interviews

4.8 • 675 Ratings

🗓️ 30 January 2023

⏱️ 43 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Many of you will know of Kent as "The Garden of England", but what many of you won't know is that many years ago Kent was known by a different nickname: "The Beer Garden of England". This was due to its unusually large number of public benches, upon which each year millions of ramblers would rest their weary legs and treat themselves to a bottle of lager (or a pint of bitter should the necessary facilities be available). Public benches have since been replaced by public houses, and this week's guest knows a thing or two about such south-easterly establishments; it's comedian and actor Joe Wilkinson!

You'll know Joe from his appearances on Live At the Apollo, 8 Out Of 10 Cats Does Countdown, After Life, as well as when he competed on The Great British Bake Off. As an accomplished stand-up he's spent many an evening frequenting pubs up and down the country, and we can only imagine that'll play some part in shaping his very own 'Pub of the Mind'.

Want to hear an extended version of this episode (featuring a Patreon-only choice), gain access to our bonus podcast ‘Behind The Cellar Door’ and support the upkeep of the pub? If so, head to moonunderpod.com and sign up to our Patreon!

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Take my hand and lead me to the mauve cauldron of desire,
0:10.0	the etched glass reflection of the glow,
0:15.0	the oak twisted chamber of rest.
0:19.0	Steer me through the fog-drenched streets and bring me to my brother
0:24.1	by the fireside blazing in the moon underwater. Oh, Oh, Robin, what a blimmin day I've had of it, mate.
1:10.8	Oh, blimmin hell. Why?
1:13.1	Well, the correct realm has got itself all into an artistic bent.
1:17.3	Okay.
1:18.1	And the street that the moon underwater reveals itself on
1:22.8	keeps turning into sort of different sort of artistic styles, different schools. Oh, yeah.
1:30.2	And when I woke up, it was cubist. Oh, God. And I could not make head nor tail of it. I couldn't
1:37.3	find the bakers. I couldn't find the whistle makers. I couldn't find the candle swain. I couldn't find any of the shops. The worst one was when it was
1:47.4	turned into an Esher painting, couldn't get up the bloody stairs. Well, I got up the bloody stairs,
1:51.5	turned out of the bottom of the blimming stairs. I'll tell you what, you get your steps in in Esher
1:55.0	paintings. You really do, actually. That's a very, no one, no one's ever said that before. No, no, they haven't. I don't
2:02.4	if that's what he was going for. Maybe he was sort of an early proponent of the couch to 5K.
2:08.2	I think if you look at that picture, you see all the little men going around that staircase. They do
2:12.4	all have an Apple Watch or Fitbit. Yes, they do all have a fit bit. But what's really interesting is what it's
2:18.4	doing now, because the light's just beginning to fade. A lot of the inhabitants, a lot of the
2:23.6	people who work in the correct realm are heading home on their sort of perambulated commute.
2:30.7	And it's actually turned into a Lowry painting.
2:34.5	Oh, lovely. It's beautiful.
	...

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