Jeffrey Epstein, Vampire
True Weird Stuff
Now! Media
4.9 • 655 Ratings
🗓️ 21 February 2026
⏱️ 89 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Today's True Weird Stuff - Jeffrey Epstein, Vampire
How do you build a conspiracy theory? Start with a villain. Add power. Stir in mystery. True Weird Stuff examines the internet's bizarre claim that Jeffrey Epstein is an immortal vampire who once lived as President Andrew Jackson. We trace the ingredients: the suspicious timing of press releases, strange digital footprints after Epstein’s death, the uncanny resemblance to the face on the $20 bill — and society's refusal to accept an unsatisfying ending.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hey, true weirdos, thank you so much for all your support. |
| 0:03.9 | Because of your support, we were able to win some awards with this podcast in the past year. |
| 0:09.8 | And be sure to stick around for the conversation we have after the episode. |
| 0:17.5 | It must be exhausting to be immortal. |
| 0:21.3 | On the one hand, there's no need to be in any kind of a hurry ever because the one thing you have is time. |
| 0:29.1 | On the other hand, all you have is time. |
| 0:32.3 | The day is stretching into years, decades, centuries, all those empty hours to fill. You've seen everything. You've |
| 0:40.1 | tasted everything, you've been everywhere. Because an immortal must, like a shark, being constant |
| 0:46.6 | motion. How else can you pull off the trick of not ever dying? While around you, every stranger, every neighbor, every friend just crumbles so quickly in the dust. |
| 1:00.0 | You can understand that an immortal being every now and again might be desperate for novelty, |
| 1:06.2 | desperate enough to risk discovery, or maybe confident and arrogant enough to know that people will believe |
| 1:14.9 | what they want to believe. People find a way to accept and live with even the most outlandish |
| 1:22.0 | contradictions. And besides, what do you care? You're immortal. These superstitious creatures who think they know something about you, please, their minds and their worlds are too narrow to make sense of anything like you. Besides, we'll be dead soon enough and whatever gossip and rumors outlive them will simply become part of |
| 1:44.9 | legend. |
| 1:46.3 | I'd be honest. |
| 1:47.8 | You love hearing those scary fireside stories about monsters and devils about you. |
| 1:57.6 | It's your favorite inside joke. |
| 2:00.5 | How many lives have you dipped in and out of? How many |
| 2:03.8 | chapters of human history have you helped to write? Now it's the age of the internet. Information |
| 2:11.5 | rocketing around the world and fragments of seconds. Still plenty of places to hide, but in a world of cell phone cameras and |
| 2:19.4 | drones and security video everywhere, it's more stressful than you like. But you're not worried. |
| 2:26.2 | You were born so much smarter than most people. And time has buffed that intellect to a terrifying |
... |
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