You know I want to know, remember we were doing an episode and you had a list of things that you were going to talk about in therapy and you went to read them and then we never got to it.

Do you, remember, I think you had like a where's that list Jamie? Yeah.

Yeah. Or or how we want to know how's therapy been going? Yeah you know it's so

weird I I had a real realization yesterday in therapy I was doing EMDR and I kind of

realized you know we you know we kind of talk at the end of the session about like things

to work on in this next week and

how things we want to get deeper into EMDR electromagnetic I don't know what it

stands but but you it's a type of therapy with light and sound and buzzing and you talk

through traumas with him orchestrating me following this light and buzzing and in my

hand tappers and these weird sounds in my headphones and I don't know what it's doing,

but it's something.

But that I kind of live in extreme emotions and you know especially in these past couple of

months I think we all have had like you know really low lows and kind of high highs

and I don't do well with that because when they happen I really go with them and I'm trying to figure out how to live more nuanced emotionally, if that makes sense.

Like I need to learn how to become comfortable in like not having such a big pendulum swing.

Yeah. You know, I'm very like I'm seemingly, from what I've heard like give off a vibe of somebody that's kind of really chill and calm,

but that's because I'm literally just always waiting to go to one side or the other.

Always.

Yeah, I guess is what I've learned.

And it's not healthy, it's not good.

And because when I do get upset or it goes to that way,

like it gets, you know, it gets, and it's,

...