ITL159: The Crucial Difference Between Discipline and Punishment
In the Loop with Andy Andrews
Matt Lempert
4.9 • 614 Ratings
🗓️ 15 November 2014
⏱️ 29 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
On this week’s episode, I answer a listener question on the difference between discipline and punishment.
Before getting into that I have a quick story:
- A few weeks ago, I was getting ready to head out of town and Polly asked, “Have you seen Carver?” Now he’s a huge standard black poodle, and it’s unusual not to see him for a few hours.
- As I’m about to leave, Polly says that they found him. He was under the garage with Skippy, our outdoor cat. It turns out the cat was sick, and Carver been under there with it for hours taking care of it.
- Polly took Skippy to the vet and he didn’t make it, but it’s amazing how intelligent these dogs can be.
- These moments can be times to talk to your kids about death, and give them comfort with how small of an amount of time they will be without someone in the grand scheme of eternity.
So, what is the difference between discipline and punishment?
- Discipline is what you are creating in a child.
- Punishment is a necessary part of discipline to get to an end result that you want, which is that this person doesn’t have to be punished or disciplined again because they now understand the concept of self-discipline.
- King Solomon said, “Discipline a child while he is young, or YOU will ruin his life.”
You want to make sure that a child knows to obey now, and if they are outside the circle of discipline then there will be a punishment.
- When you make sure the child knows to obey, there will come a time that you can say, “stop” and they stop. Subconsciously, this child is aware that they stopped but that they still want to continue moving forward.
- Subconsciously, this child is beginning to connect that they can make themselves do something that they don’t want to do, to get a result they want…not be punished.
- That is the very beginning of a thought process leading to self-discipline.
Questions for Listeners
Do you have a question? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!
- Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY
- E-Mail: InTheLoop@AndyAndrews.com
- Facebook.com/AndyAndrews
- Twitter.com/AndyAndrews
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | You're listening to In the Loop, a unique opportunity to see life from a different perspective |
| 0:06.5 | with New York Times bestselling author, Andy Andrews. |
| 0:10.3 | Now here's your host, David Loy. |
| 0:12.9 | Hello and welcome to In The Loop with Andy Andrews. |
| 0:15.9 | I'm your host, David Loy. |
| 0:17.4 | And with me, once again again is my good friend. |
| 0:22.0 | Mr. Loop. |
| 0:23.9 | Andy Andrews. |
| 0:25.1 | Andy, how are you? |
| 0:25.8 | Good, good, man. |
| 0:26.9 | I'm excited to be here with you. |
| 0:28.7 | I love doing this and so what do we have? |
| 0:32.7 | Well, I've got a quick question. |
| 0:33.8 | It's a personal question. |
| 0:34.9 | You might not want to answer it. |
| 0:36.0 | Well, if you have a question, feel free to call the 800 number and leave the voicemail for me. |
| 0:42.7 | No, this was my personal question before we get to the actual question. A few weeks ago, |
| 0:47.0 | you told me about a loss that the Andrews family experienced, a pet. And there was a story that you told me, though, about the day that that happened |
| 1:00.2 | and how one of your other pets was intricately involved in that. |
| 1:05.6 | Yeah. |
| 1:05.6 | Yeah, this was, oh, my gosh. |
| 1:07.9 | I was actually getting ready to get out of town. |
... |
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