ITL146: What to Say to Your Kids When They're Too Hard on Themselves
In the Loop with Andy Andrews
Matt Lempert
4.9 • 614 Ratings
🗓️ 16 August 2014
⏱️ 24 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
On this week’s episode, I share my perspective on how to talk to your kids when they are being to hard on themselves and falling apart.
As parents, it is crucial that we are vulnerable about our pasts.
- Some kids need to know another person has experienced the same problems as they have.
- Obviously we’ve forgotten what being 12 feels like, but we can try to imagine how things are going on in their minds.
My son, Adam, is very sensitive and tends to think about things that might not bother his older brother.
- His feelings don’t get hurt easily, but he is very aware of what other people are feeling—and he tends to focus on areas where he’s not doing so well.
- I encourage you to help your child understand that we are all in the same boat together.
- We all have strengths and weaknesses, and you can always find someone better than you.
- Talk to your children about how they act, walk, and talk—and try to instill these habits in their lives.
I recently heard a pastor say to the church’s youth, “Sometimes God will give you a weakness that you really have to struggle with, and it will become a strength.”
I told Adam a story about two football teams.
- The first team had athletes that didn’t have to work hard to beat the other team every year.
- One year the second team decided to start lifting weights and working out harder than ever.
- The first time they played the really good team again, they lost worse than before because their bodies were sore.
- But the next year after sticking with the workouts, they creamed the other team. The first team decided to start working out harder, but they were already too far behind.
Make sure to check out the free parenting videos on the website. There’s a bunch of great information on how to talk to your kids.
Here’s a link, so you don’t have to go hunting: Click here
Questions for Listeners
Do you have a question? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!
- Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY
- E-Mail: InTheLoop@AndyAndrews.com
- Facebook.com/AndyAndrews
- Twitter.com/AndyAndrews
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | You're listening to In the Loop, a unique opportunity to see life from a different perspective |
| 0:06.5 | with New York Times bestselling author, Andy Andrews. |
| 0:10.4 | Now here's your host, David Loy. |
| 0:12.9 | Hi and welcome to In the Loop with Andy Andrews. |
| 0:16.2 | I'm your host, David Loy, and with me, once again, I'm thrilled, as always, to make this |
| 0:22.4 | introduction. |
| 0:24.1 | Andy Andrews. You are so funny. Yes. I'm glad I'm so thrilled. I am. I'm excited. You should |
| 0:32.0 | see me. Sometimes you and I are sitting across the table from each other. Sometimes you're |
| 0:36.0 | just quivering with excitement. |
| 0:38.3 | Sometimes we get to watch each other doing this, but today we are, what, 700 miles away or whatever it is. |
| 0:45.4 | Right, that's right. |
| 0:46.2 | But if you can see my face, you would know that I am smiling. |
| 0:49.1 | I am thrilled. |
| 0:49.8 | I'm excited to be here. |
| 0:51.6 | Well, I'm excited to be here, too. |
| 0:57.5 | So what's going on in Andy Andrews world these days? Oh, man, we're just, we're having a great time here. I'm actually at home, |
| 1:04.2 | as you know. I'm in Orange Beach. And so just we're having a great time, living life, learning. |
| 1:15.0 | And Austin and I were out today you know he's uh working with some people and helping some people and so uh he still hasn't gotten a driver's |
| 1:23.2 | license and so sometimes i i work with him you know he, he doesn't pay me and he won't fire me, |
| 1:29.8 | but other than that, it seems to be a great job. That's a great relationship right there. |
| 1:35.7 | Somebody must have taught you wrong what the working relationship looks like, if that's the |
| 1:39.7 | arrangement you've agreed to with your son. Well, I, you know, I enjoy, I enjoy being around the boys. |
... |
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