Thanks for listening to my call of the day podcast. You can hear my live radio program Monday through Friday from two to five PM Eastern time on serious XM triumph 11. Ashlyn welcome to the program. What can I do for you?

Well, this one is an interesting one on meeting some meeting some of your meeting some of your advice. So we'll get into it.

I've been in a long term relationship for about four years now and getting to the point where talking about marriage and taking the next step.

We certainly we had a conversation where he said that he was about fairly certain that we were going to take that next step.

I'm sorry. Do you know what fairly certain means?

Yes or no? Come on. We need communication. Nobody can see your face. So I need you to answer in words. Okay. Do you know what fairly certain means?

Yes. Fairly certain. What is it not all the way convinced? No means nothing. It's a put off. Okay.

Yes, to give up nookie if he tells you the truth, doesn't he? Yes. Okay. Four years. How old are you?

Twenty seven. And how old is he? Twenty four.

How embarrassed would you be to walk away? Your parents probably said something. Your friends probably said something and you went no no no no no.

So I'm just wondering how embarrassed would you be if they were right?

That's what I'm going. The question is how embarrassed would you be? That's an important question. Seriously.

Because a lot of times women stick with stupid stuff because they're embarrassed to look like they failed.

Yes. And to me failure at this point more looks like you're staying than leaving. But in your head it may not be so.

So how embarrassed are you going to be if you walk away? Well I'm very embarrassed because he said that he wasn't sure and needed some space and then said he wasn't sure if he wanted to marry me and he and the relationship.

He never intended to don't get excited. He never intended to. Which is why when you push the envelope he's out of here.

You didn't listen to the people who warned you. The people who know you very well and who are nice people.

Not just opinionated jerks but nice people warned you. I'm sure of it. And you didn't listen.

And you wasted four years. And probably now you're going to walk around the face to the earth saying I don't trust men.

Most likely. Yes. But it has nothing to do with men. It has to do with you not choosing wisely. There are a lot of men out there.

Some will use you for five years before they dump you. He only used you for four. Some are just terrific eyes. But you didn't listen and you didn't choose wisely.

So if you're now going to unwisely lean back on embarrassment. How much more your life do you want to throw away?

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