Is it okay to keep money secrets in a relationship?
This Is Uncomfortable
Marketplace
4.6 • 3.6K Ratings
🗓️ 5 February 2026
⏱️ 28 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
How much do you share with your partner about your finances? Sometimes, a little privacy starts to look a lot like a secret. And secrets (especially the money kind) have a way of becoming problems.
On this week’s episode, Reema talks to people on the streets of Portland about their real-life money secrets, and chats with divorce lawyer Randy Kessler and couples counselor Jeff Guenther, who’ve seen how financial secrecy can fracture relationships — and sometimes bring people closer.
If you liked this episode, share it with a friend. And let us know what you think by emailing uncomfortable@marketplace.org or calling 347-RING-TIU. Have you ever kept a big money secret from your partner? We want to know! And follow us on Instagram and Tiktok!
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | It's easy to know you want to make a change in your life, but it is hard to actually do it. |
| 0:05.4 | How to Be a Better Human from TED is a podcast for when self-help feels too daunting or just not for you. |
| 0:10.8 | I'm Chris Duffy, the host of How to Be a Better Human, and trust me, I do not have it all figured out. |
| 0:15.1 | But join me as I talk to experts about actually attainable ways we can try to improve our lives. |
| 0:22.0 | Whether it's facing fears, |
| 0:27.1 | setting boundaries, cleaning your house, or all sorts of other topics. Find how to be a better human wherever you get your podcasts. When I was like in fifth grade, I used to carpool with a neighbor. |
| 0:33.6 | And I remember once her mom pulled into a gas station and then sprinted into the convenience store, |
| 0:39.4 | and she came back with a bunch of snacks, a bag of chips, maybe some juice, |
| 0:44.0 | and she handed some of it to us in the back seat. |
| 0:46.4 | And then she looked at her daughter and whispered, |
| 0:49.0 | we don't need to tell dad about this. |
| 0:53.2 | It was a small thing, but I think when you're a kid, you can register when something feels |
| 0:58.0 | off, even if you don't really know why. |
| 1:00.8 | Kind of like hearing a note that's out of tune. |
| 1:03.3 | Your ear catches it, even if you know nothing about music. |
| 1:06.6 | Who knows what was behind that comment, but the story I tell myself about it is that my |
| 1:10.6 | friend's mom probably didn't want to get I tell myself about it is that my friend's |
| 1:10.9 | mom probably didn't want to get into an argument about it with her husband. |
| 1:14.4 | Maybe he's a little stricter when it comes to spending money. |
| 1:17.3 | Maybe it was just easier to keep it a secret. |
| 1:23.1 | I'm Rima Grace, and welcome to This Is Uncomfortable, a show for Marketplace about life and how |
| 1:28.0 | money messes with it. We are now a weekly podcast, which gives us a chance this February to spend |
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