So I'm going to mark my birthday, no, not going to say how old I am,

by reveling in my new found autocratic powers,

because I'm sorry to have to announce that we now live

under a left-wing dictatorship.

That's right, for those of you being dissing me

in the comments section.

And I'll get to send you to a Reeducation camp

unless you buckle up your attitudes.

So the revelation were not in fact ruled

by a pretty right-wing conservative government.

Some of you might have been laboring under that

of this apprehension, you massive weirdos.

That comes in the daily telegraph with a vague calm

and reasoned headline.

Britain is now an elite dictatorship

where majority opinions are crushed,

so rights the silenced and persecuted Alistair Heath,

the highly marginalized editor of the Sunday telegraph.

Now he makes it clear he thinks this elite dictatorship

is left-wing.

Declarating that left-wing activists

have taken over the legal profession,

...