Hello, everyone. Well, four hours of Paradise per week seems like way too much time to allow very

pretty people to open their hearts to each other. Can I get an amen? Especially when all they do is

drink, lift weights, and sleep in daybeds until the sun goes down. I'm looking at you, Joe the gross,

sir. So my mission, and I do choose to accept it, will be to water down all the nonsense into a handful

of entertaining storylines you need to know. For example, as someone who weighs 40 pounds,

will Demi have the physical strength to shove someone with her pointy fingernails?

Will Victoria P ever learn James's name? Or will she continue to call him

Jordan at all of the Bachelor franchise get-togethers? Are we ever going to learn how tall Thomas is?

That's a joke. And because watching 240 hours of BIP has a tendency to mess with one's brain,

some guy in Austin and I do slide off the rails a few times in this episode.

You'll be happy to hear we discuss in links, in sinks, bye, bye, bye video,

and devote way too much time to practicing our remedial Spanish.

You're going to love it. It's Moibian.

Hey, everyone, I'm Lindsay, and welcome to the I Hate Green Beans podcast.

During each episode, I'll be discussing television, movies, music, and books with friends

who love pop culture as much as I do. For those of you wondering, yes, we will be talking

about the Bachelor franchise, and no, I do not want to try your grandmother's

famous green bean cassero recipe. But thanks for offering. Now sit back, relax, and enjoy the show.

It's episode 2.30 of the I hate green beans podcast. I'm your host, Lindsay Ray. I'm here with some guy in Austin.

And we're going to miraculously pare down four hours of Bachelor in Paradise into about 30 minutes of things you need to know. How excited are you?

I'm really, really excited. I do want to talk about the tongue thing. I'm sure we'll get there.

Ooh, that's what we call a teaser, people.

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