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The Daily Show: Ears Edition

ICYMI - Dulce Sloan Calls on Americans to Take the Damn Census

The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Comedy Central

News, Daily News, Comedy

4.214.2K Ratings

🗓️ 17 May 2020

⏱️ 6 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Former U.S. Census Bureau Director Bob Groves talks to Dulce Sloan about why it's so important -- and easy -- for all Americans to take the 2020 Census online. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

You're listening to Comedy Central.

0:09.0

During quarantine, I've been getting two things.

0:11.5

DMs from dudes checking to see if I'm all stocked up

0:14.5

and reminders to take the census.

0:17.5

And I know just who to call to make it stop.

0:20.5

Bop.

0:24.0

Hey, Dolcey.

0:25.0

Why are you sending me out of smell to do something on the internet?

0:28.0

Well, Dolcey, this is the first time the census has been done online.

0:32.5

And it only takes 10 minutes.

0:34.0

Listen, during this quarantine, I got so much on my plate,

0:36.5

trying to work on these dating profiles.

0:38.5

I'm in the middle of two bus feed quizzes

0:40.5

and they got all these new Instagram filters.

0:42.5

I mean, they got one of the make you look like Frederick Douglass.

0:46.5

Well, that's gonna be a problem.

0:47.5

Takes 10 minutes, 10 minutes for school lunches, for highways,

0:52.0

for schools, for health care.

0:54.0

While I hate to admit it, Bob may have a point.

0:56.5

Every 10 years, the US census tries to count how many people live in America.

1:01.0

It uses those numbers to decide how to split up federal funding

1:04.0

for things like fire stations, schools, and hospitals.

...

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