ICYMI - Dulce Sloan Calls on Americans to Take the Damn Census
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Comedy Central
4.2 • 14.2K Ratings
🗓️ 17 May 2020
⏱️ 6 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | You're listening to Comedy Central. |
| 0:09.0 | During quarantine, I've been getting two things. |
| 0:11.5 | DMs from dudes checking to see if I'm all stocked up |
| 0:14.5 | and reminders to take the census. |
| 0:17.5 | And I know just who to call to make it stop. |
| 0:20.5 | Bop. |
| 0:24.0 | Hey, Dolcey. |
| 0:25.0 | Why are you sending me out of smell to do something on the internet? |
| 0:28.0 | Well, Dolcey, this is the first time the census has been done online. |
| 0:32.5 | And it only takes 10 minutes. |
| 0:34.0 | Listen, during this quarantine, I got so much on my plate, |
| 0:36.5 | trying to work on these dating profiles. |
| 0:38.5 | I'm in the middle of two bus feed quizzes |
| 0:40.5 | and they got all these new Instagram filters. |
| 0:42.5 | I mean, they got one of the make you look like Frederick Douglass. |
| 0:46.5 | Well, that's gonna be a problem. |
| 0:47.5 | Takes 10 minutes, 10 minutes for school lunches, for highways, |
| 0:52.0 | for schools, for health care. |
| 0:54.0 | While I hate to admit it, Bob may have a point. |
| 0:56.5 | Every 10 years, the US census tries to count how many people live in America. |
| 1:01.0 | It uses those numbers to decide how to split up federal funding |
| 1:04.0 | for things like fire stations, schools, and hospitals. |
... |
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