The following podcast contains explicit language.

Welcome to Mom and Daughter Fighting, Slate's parenting podcasts for Thursday, December 17th, the I Want Better Grandparents Edition.

I'm Elizabeth Newkamp. I write the homeschool and family travel blog, Dutch Dutch, Goose.

I'm the mom to three littles, Henry who's eight, Oliver, who's six, and Teddy, who's four, and we live in Navar, Florida. I'm Jamila Lemieux, a writer, contributor to Slate's Karen Feeding parenting column, host of Slate's the kids are asleep, and mom to Naima, who is seven, and we live in Los Angeles, California. I'm Dan Coice. I'm a writer at Slate,

and the author of the book How to Be a Family. My daughters are Lyra, who's 15, and Harper, who's 13,

and we live in Arlington, Virginia. Well, this week, we've got a question about a little girl who

wishes her me maw and pepaw would be better grandparents. Then we'll be debating what to do

when tragedy strikes. A stuffed animal gets lost forever and your kid is heartbroken. On our

slate plus bonus segment, we'll be talking about kids texting, emailing, and finding their written voice.

And as always, we have triumphs and fails and recommendations.

So Jamila, why don't you start us off triumph or fail today?

I am calling this a fail. I was having a back and forth with Naima the other day, as I often am,

which is challenging because much of our going back and forth is simply me explaining that

we should not be going back and forth that I, as her parent, have the right to use certain tone of voice or to make certain decisions

on her behalf and, you know, that I'm doing these in her best interest, but that she doesn't

always get to challenge them, right? And so I said something about her tone of voice, and she said,

that's how you speak to me.

And I said, well, Naima, I'm an adult.

That's called authority.

And she said, you authority.

You authority?

Yes.

...