Am I the jerk for refusing to drop charges in exchange for saving my family?

So the original post for this one came back in September of 2024.

I am a 33-year-old man, and I met my wife, who was also 33, in college.

It was a long-term physical relationship that turned serious at the end of our senior year.

After graduation, I didn't have plans, so I decided to move to her hometown, major southern city. I didn't know anybody, so we were together 24-7 and moved in together within a year. During this time, I met her family a few times. She had a huge extended family, where her mom, Sharon, was the matriarch.

Her dad died in a workplace accident and her mum got a lot of money.

She was smart and invested and is doing well.

All of Sharon's siblings and nieces and nephews looked to her for advice on all major life decisions.

She's paid for school, weddings and helped start businesses.

My wife has two brothers,

who I always got along with, we'd hang out independent of my wife a few times a year.

We got married after three years, and when my son was born, Sharon bought us a house three blocks from hers. We'd lived in a downtown loft-style apartment, and this was honestly a relief. But with the

house came Sharon constantly being in my life, coming in the house unannounced, unsolicited

advice and snive remarks at my expense. Eventually 18 months later, we had a blow-up fight and I moved

my family across town to an apartment. My wife was

annoyed and our relationship has deteriorated. Sharon hates me and has turned most of their family

against me. I didn't see or go to any of her family events for over a year. My wife still

saw her family but because I wasn't invited and they were over 30

minutes away, it was much less. Sharon went from seeing her grandson almost every day to once a month.

So of course, her hate for me went through the roof. The incident. My wife had to work and I was

asked to take my son to his cousin's birthday party.

The party was at Sharon's house. And if it wasn't my son's first cousin, six months apart,

...