I Married My Subway Crush

Modern Love

The New York Times

Love, Redemption, Society & Culture, Nytimes, Nyt, Loss, Essay, Storytelling, New York Times

4.3 • 9K Ratings

🗓️ 6 December 2023

⏱️ 28 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Zoe Fishman couldn’t stop thinking about the man she called her “subway crush.” For years, she saw Ronen on the train and admired him from afar. When they finally connected, it turned out Ronen felt the same, and they began a blissful life together. But when their story took a devastating turn, Zoe had to grapple with longing for Ronen at a distance again. For the final episode of our season, we hear about the joy and loss that showed up in Zoe’s life, and the remarkable way she learned to live with both of them. Zoe Fishman is the author of several novels, most recently “The Fun Widow’s Book Tour.”

Transcript

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0:00.0	Love now and
0:02.0	and do you.
0:04.0	The first that I love.
0:05.0	The love was stronger than anything.
0:07.0	I feel the love for love.
0:08.0	And I love you more than anything.
0:11.0	There's still love. From the New York Times, I'm Anna Martin.
0:18.0	This is Modern Love.
0:20.0	I'm just gonna say it, because, you know, there's no use hiding it. I am about to turn 30
0:27.4	Yes, you heard it 30 the big 3 oh not freaking out at all. Of course I am. I've been taking a lot of time to reflect on my
0:38.4	20s now that I'm almost out of them and I keep thinking about how deeply confusing my early 20s were.
0:46.0	I feel like I went through a kind of second puberty at that time,
0:50.0	just one where I could legally drink and I had to pay rent.
0:54.1	Even though I dated a lot, I hadn't ever really been in love
0:58.1	because I wasn't ready for it.
1:01.2	When Zoe Fishman's essay starts, that's where she was too.
1:04.7	In that weird exhilarating early 20s part of her life, where finding love was still a long
1:10.1	ways off.
1:11.8	Zoe was living in Brooklyn, trying to make it as a writer.
1:14.6	She was smoking cigarettes at apartment parties.
1:17.1	She basically had nothing figured out.
1:19.6	So I had to ask, was it as Francis Ha as it sounds?
	...

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