brought to you by the every dollar app start budgeting for free today today's question comes from

terry in north carolina my wife and i have worked hard we paid off our debt and have a net worth of

eight million we still watch every dollar and save and invest as much as possible my brother and

his wife do not follow the same strategy.

Recently, my brother approached me for some money because he has failed to pay taxes for years.

And the IRS is threatening to put a lien on his house. He now owes over 100,000 that I know about.

I believe in helping family, so I have given him over 23,000, and I plan to give him

another 8K soon. I created a budget for him, set up separate accounts to help avoid reflex spending,

and even recommended he listened to your podcasts. Things went well for a month, but I found out he and

his wife majorly overspent on gifts during the holidays.

My worry is that my help has been a waste.

He doesn't seem to recognize the damage that he is doing to our relationship by essentially spending my money on frivolous items while I keep the IRS office back.

He also doesn't seem to understand that every dollar I

give him is one I can't invest myself. Should I just walk away at this point? I'm going to say yes.

Let me back up my position on this, Dave. I'm looking at some of the language that you're using,

and what I see here is resentment building

because clearly you don't like the way he's living his life. I like that you're giving him the

money and not aloning it to him. But because in your mind there's these strings attached that

he's not following, I feel like it's causing, it's causing unrest in you and in your

spirit. I'm like, listen, you got to guard your heart a little bit because if you keep giving him money

and he continues to not do what you think he should do, it's just going to build up your anger towards him,

your resentment towards him. I mean, you said it right here. You said, let's see, he keeps spending my money

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