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Here it is.

Strawberry letter.

Thank you, nephew.

Subject, I'm not sure whose baby this is.

Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm writing in to get some advice for my brother

because he's been duped by his wife. She's been in and out of his life for years

and doing whatever she wanted to do in the marriage. He told us that his wife

has never cheated on him, but I beg to differ because their baby came out looking like he's the

son of Colonel Sanders. We call him Light Bright because he is not getting any darker.

My brother is a caramel colored and his wife is a little bit lighter than he is, but not as clear-colored as the baby.

My brother said they got a DNA test done, but he didn't follow up with the results because

he knows it's his baby.

He's a sucker for his wife and I can't stand to see him mistreated.

She's always with her Caucasian best friend

and I think that girl's brother is the baby daddy.

I called my sister-in-law about a month ago and I told her I want to sit down with her and go over

...