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Try and win 11. Joanna. Welcome to the program.

Hi, Dr. Laura. Thank you so much for taking my call. Hi. Hi, so I have a, I have a question. So my son has joined the Army.

And he's a bootcamp right now. And he there's very little communication between us. Like he, like I say, like, you know, can we, can we talk on the phone or can we face time? And he said, you know, I'd rather just text.

But he's like, he barely text. And when I say to him, you know, how's it going? Like, he's busy. Mommy. He's not in summer camp. Mommy.

Let go. You know, I mean, no, and I guess I talked more, but you know what? And I know I shouldn't compare, but then like, there's another mom who I met like at the signing.

And there are very insecure little boys who have to stay connected to their mom. He's all the time.

Or there are boys who like their dads are so dominated by the mother that they fear punishment if they don't.

And he's always learning how to be self-sufficient in the army. I think you need to respect that and not make comparisons.

Okay, but then when I do ask him, you know, how's it going? He'll, he'll just say, fine.

Oh my God. How many times do I say parent? Did I say to parents? Don't ask stupid questions.

What was it going? He's in freaking boot camp. How do you think it's going? It's miserable. And he's facing it.

Averspect. Have regard. Have pride. Stop being his mommy and start being his mother.

So then Dr. War, how do I, then what do I say to him? Like, I don't even know what to text him. Like, I take some pictures. Like, you know, I mean, and I say, you know, I hope you had a great day.

But stop telling up guy who's in the military in boot camp. Have a great, freaking day. I can't seem to get through your head.

I'm sorry. You're acting like a silly woman.

Hey, how is your dad? Have a great day. How many bullets did you fire today? I mean, come on. I like to know that.

And why not? What do I want to watch? You can't watch my son then.

Leave him alone until you decide to stop being his mommy and be in Vot and be invested in every moment of his day.

Leave him alone until you can do that.

So what does that mean? So I stopped texting him.

Right. Let him text you when he wants to make a contact.

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