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Triumph 111. Chad, welcome to the program.

Hi, Dr. Dora. How are you doing? Good. What can I do for you?

Yes, ma'am. I have an 11 year old son who's just started middle school and I have him half of the time a week at a time.

I split custody with his mother and there have been some issues. First of all, he has a smartphone, which I know is probably not advisable.

There were some limitations that we had put in place for that, but I have been honestly a little lax on that since he started school.

And I'm just looking for some guidance on how to kind of reel him back in and what kind of hard boundaries or guidelines to set.

You're divorced. Kid has two worlds he has to deal with. And you want to do psycho babble boundaries like he's cattle.

He has to deal with two people, two separate lives. Doesn't have a homie visits. What do you want from him?

You guys made vows until death do us part, ma'am, sir, ma'am. You guys did vows of till death do us part. Wasn't that a boundary?

Yes.

Yeah, he watched two adults blow up his world.

And then expect him to follow all the rules. I'm always amused when parents actually think that's going to work.

So if you want to put limits on a phone, good luck. Good luck.

Good luck.

I have no advice on how to do that. Anything else you want to put limits on?

No, just one last question if I can. Yeah, of course.

When I discussed, you know, some of these limitations and what he should or should not be doing on the smartphone.

His response is I'm increasing his anxiety and he's just going to go stay with his mother and that he just doesn't trust me.

Is there anything smart? Sir, you are screwed because you divorced and you got him a smartphone.

And he manipulates because he got he has two places to go. You piss him off. He goes to mom mom piss him off. He goes to you.

He's figured out how to play the game.

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