I Don't Know What To Say

Comedy of the Week

BBC

Comedy

4 • 2.8K Ratings

🗓️ 13 November 2023

⏱️ 28 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We have all been in a situation where we don’t know what to say, or how best to support a friend during a major negative life event. When Laura Smyth was diagnosed with breast cancer she was blown away (and highly amused) at how poorly many around her responded to the news. From pulling the wrong face, to offering medical advice sourced on YouTube, to simply panicking and saying nothing at all… we have a tendency to put our foot in it. In this half-hour special, Laura applies her award-winning stand up skills to the world of grieving, sharing funny and poignant anecdotes from her journey with cancer and her interactions with friends, family and strangers. She asks why it is so difficult to say the right thing when trying to support loved ones, explores the sometimes unrealistic expectations that grievers put upon others, and speaks to psychotherapist Philippa Perry to get an expert opinion. There may not be a perfect solution or ideal response, but can we all be better at knowing what to say? Written and performed by Laura Smyth Produced by Sasha Bobak Executive Producer: Pete Strauss Production Coordinator: Katie Baum An EcoAudio certified production It is a BBC Studios production for Radio 4.

Transcript

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0:00.0	BBC Sounds, music radio podcasts. I'm going to go and know what you're trying to.
0:13.0	I'm just going to live what you're saying.
0:16.0	And you're going to live what you need me
0:18.0	for the break so forth. Ladies, give the cheer.
0:25.0	One in eight of you will get breast cancer, I'm sorry.
0:30.0	Um, men. Sorry.
0:34.0	Men. Prostate.
0:37.0	Sorry I feel bad saying it.
0:40.0	No I had it. That's what a lot of this shows about.
0:42.0	I had breast cancer. I was diagnosed two years ago I'm glad it was the sexy one
0:45.9	it is though isn't it a sexy one I mean no one gets together with their mates and does a
0:49.7	5K and a brown tutu for colon cancer they don colon cancer. They don't do it. And I'm not being glib at all about getting
0:57.3	cancer of course I'm not it knocked me off course. It was like a freight train in my life I sort of
1:01.2	cried out God ask why why me God I went to my doctor and I said well why why me doctor and he said well why me doctor and he said well these things are just genetic he said like I could draw but he said there are lifestyle factors I said like what he says well, you know
1:15.1	Being overweight lack of exercise poor diet smoking drinking stress
1:19.7	consultant said it was the only time he'd ever had anyone in his office shout bingo.
1:23.2	In all seriousness gang, in all seriousness I walked out of that hospital crying my
1:30.9	eyes out I did, I phoned phone my husband he said what they say
1:34.0	babe I said yeah they said they said it's just genetic it's just like a draw my
1:42.1	diagnosis took time in that until my mastectomy they thought it was all contained
1:46.2	but after taking a sample of my lymph nodes during surgery they realized it could have spread
1:50.6	further so that I had the full
	...

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