Hey folks, this is Kevin. Just a few words before we start.

Listen, you may have noticed that the very first episodes of Risk from 2009-2010 are no

longer available for free on iTunes or on our website.

But finally, they are back. You can find the first episodes of Risk in the album section

of the iTunes Store. Remastered with all advertising removed for $0.99 each, you can find them there

along with our All-Star episodes. Get to the album section of iTunes and you can hear

classic stories from people like Mike Lee and Black.

I'm not a pussy. And just as I'm having those thoughts, I throw up all of them.

Christian Finnegan. This, uh, word-of-the-wise, do not eat Mexican food when you're planning

on having group sex. That's a good, put that in your book.

Andy Borowitz. I saw that the guy was O.J. Simpson.

Now when we think of O.J. Simpson, we all think of the same thing, right? Author.

So the next day, we traveled to a small village in Africa and I'm escorted into the hut of

a 113-year-old sex expert. And I'm like, I'm going to ask her everything about sex, you know,

from the tink to the balls. I'm, you know, I'm not holding back, you know, I'm just, what's

dirty sands? You know, I don't know these things, but I want to.

Mike Daisy. But I can't apologize because freedom has been freedom has been freedom has been

freedom. And all the shit just started pouring out of my mouth.

Janine Garafalo. And Willarnett claimed he could hear John

Hodgman through the walls doing a thing called a pump and dump. I'm so sorry to

say. I have not heard of it. I said, what is that? And Willarnett, picture Willarnett,

saying, oh, it's when you defecate and masturbate at the same time. And he said it to

...