We are number one.

We just grabbed every key demographic.

Super duper, gay. Super duper. That's nice. Way to go. Need oh, game. Yes, boy. That was good news. It is the 26th day of May, 2026. Good morning, everybody. Welcome to the Power Chub Morning Show on a Tuesday. Yeah, it's Tuesday. That's right. It is Tuesday. Three-day weekend. Hi, big weekend for Zach O and I.

My name is Chris Hockey, by the way. Corey's here, saucy's here, Marnie on her way in. I think Johnny Bonas has gone for like the next three months or three years. So no Johnny Bones today. We miss you, buddy. Here's Fred Stoller with some comedy power to the morning show on a Tuesday morning. Come on in.

It's going to be a great week. I am glad you are here. You people look like you're doing. Look at these young, attractive, well adjust. I'm freaked out of holidays coming up. I don't even know what you want in L.A. The weather's the same. It could be Christmas Memorial Day. I hate these three-day holidays Monday when people are off.

I don't want it off because I don't work anyway.

It doesn't make any difference.

Everyone there's somewhere, the streets are empty. They're barbecueing, leaping, hugging. I'm walking the street by myself going, is there mail today? Why isn't there male? I almost had my first blind date, didn't get past the first phone call, took a

the girl right away.

She goes, oh, I'm going to rebound. My boyfriend hurt me. I want to hurt him like he hurt me, but I can't. She goes, I thought just to get back in my sleep with some guy, but that one hurt him. I said, nah, maybe it will. You know when you haven't had sex in a real long time, when you finally get it, it's such a relief?

That's what I'm hoping happens to me.

Ah, women's shmimming. You know what I'm talking about?

I met this girl last week, and we went back to my place, and one thing led to nothing.

She goes, no sex, we're just going to sleep, will be friends.

What friends do that?

I played basketball my friend the other day and said,

what do you want to do now?

Let's take a nap together.

Ha ha. I'm going to go. I know You are

You are flasked your general care I know that

I know that.

Fate is on your side

...