Those first days were shock and to be totally blunt about it a lot of screaming.

The reality of what happened honestly took years to unfold.

Piece by piece by piece.

Two and three years later, I would go to call him,

or I would see something I thought was really cool

that he would like and I would go to text him.

It's like part of your brain doesn't get the memo that your person died.

Welcome to How Toe, I'm Charles Doe.

Right now is a really hard time.

And if you're anything like me, you have friends or family members who are struggling with loss.

Or maybe you're mourning someone yourself.

How we process that grief and how we console others, those are really hard questions.

Even in the best of times, it's sometimes not clear how to help other people, which is at the

core of a question we got a few months ago from Ann and Arizona.

Well, I reached out because a few weeks ago, one of my brother-in-law's died I immediately talked to my dad about it and my

my sister and brother-in-law live out of state and my dad was kind of telling me, you know, you should give her

space, don't contact her right away. And in the past, when I've been around people

who have lost family members, I've kind of felt like a deer in the headlights,

and I usually don't stay much. But I know when I was grieving last year, when people did that to me it hurt because I felt like they didn't care.

And tell me a little bit about what happened last year and your experiences with grief.

Well, I mean this isn't the only experience I've had with grief.

I've definitely had some other losses, but last year I had what was a very sudden miscarriage. I was 13 weeks along so it was very, very unexpected.

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