How to Resolve Conflicts in Relationships: A Conversation with Esther Perel

Open to Debate

News, Society & Culture, Education

4.5 • 2.1K Ratings

🗓️ 19 December 2025

⏱️ 52 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Couples have arguments over many topics. However, it’s through resolving conflict that both people in the relationship feel heard and seen. Psychotherapist, relationship expert, and New York Times-bestselling author Esther Perel says conflict when navigated skillfully can lead to growth, resilience, and a stronger bond. In this conversation with John Donvan, Perel shares her experience working with different relationship types, strategies for transforming conflict into a constructive dialogue, and the importance of validating both sides’ perspectives. Our guest: Esther Perel, Psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author Emmy award-winning journalist John Donvan moderates Visit OpentoDebate.org to watch more insightful debates. Subscribe to our newsletter to stay informed on our curated weekly debates, dynamic live events, and educational initiatives. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Do you know what you want for Christmas?
0:02.8	A cute toy.
0:04.1	No, I just want my family back.
0:06.2	That's what I want for Christmas.
0:08.2	We'll see what I can do, okay?
0:10.3	It's Christmas, so deal could share.
0:12.8	Merry Christmas.
0:14.0	Tis the season to watch Tully on Channel 4.
0:16.8	Stream now.
0:21.2	Hi, John Donvan here.
0:22.7	Today on Open to Debate, we are revisiting my conversation with Esther Perel from 2024,
0:27.6	where we talked about resolving personal conflicts rather than the policy and cultural ones we usually highlight here.
0:34.1	This episode turned out to be a listener favorite, and in fact, it won a New York Festival's Radio Award as a talk program. We originally aired it for Valentine's Day, but we thought
0:42.9	it was worth revisiting at this time of year when we are, at least many of us, spending a lot of time
0:48.1	with loved ones, and maybe getting into some arguments. So, please enjoy the wisdom of Esther Perel. As most of you know,
0:57.5	this program tends to focus on debatable topics that are usually of a quite weighty nature,
1:02.7	things like foreign policy and economics and cultural trends and philosophical political disputes.
1:09.3	But this time, instead of a debate,
1:11.4	I'm going to have a conversation with psychotherapist Esther Perel,
1:14.8	host of the podcast, Where Should We Begin,
1:17.1	who has also made a name for herself globally, really,
1:21.0	in offering thoughtful and thought-provoking insight
	...

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