How To Relax The Need To Control Everything | Rosa Lewis

10% Happier with Dan Harris

10% Media, LLC

Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.6 • 12.9K Ratings

🗓️ 22 April 2026

⏱️ 61 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Plus: Navigating the "dark night of the soul," the power of saying "no," and how to be more present.

Rosa Lewis is a mystic, awakening guide, artist and writer. She is the author of many books, most recently Unlocking the Depths of Being: Wholehearted Presence for a Mystical Reality. The last two meditations on this playlist are related to her book.

Join Dan and Emmy Award-winning journalist Allison Gilbert at 92NY on May 17th for a live conversation about how mindfulness can deepen connection and combat loneliness, available in person and via streaming. Register here.

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18, 2026. Register here.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	This is the 10% Happier Podcast. I'm Dan Harris.
0:18.0	Hey, gang, one of the most venerable spiritual cliches is the notion of being present.
0:25.4	It may be a cliche and therefore slightly annoying, but it is also an incredibly important concept
0:31.0	and skill, being awake and alive to your life during this limited period of time when you're here on this planet.
0:39.5	So today we're going to talk about what being present actually means and then, crucially, how to actually do it.
0:47.1	My guest is a meditation teacher and self-described mystic named Rosa Lewis.
0:53.0	Rosa and I talk about why sadness and grief, which of course
0:57.0	nobody likes, can actually enable presence, the difference between feeling sadness and getting
1:02.7	lost in self-pity, why the so-called dark night of the soul is a very normal stage in spiritual
1:09.2	practice, why, and this is counterintuitive, but why
1:12.4	visualizing death can help you process the bad things that have happened to you, why saying
1:17.8	no can be a spiritual practice, and much more. Before we dive in, I just want to say that if you
1:23.2	want to meditate with me, I have two live in-person events coming up. On May 17th, I'll be at
1:29.3	the 92nd Street Y in New York City. I'll do a guided meditation, and then I'll talk about how
1:34.5	the practice can help you in this chaotic world, and then I'll take your questions. It's going to be
1:39.5	great. You should come May 17th, 92nd Street Y. Then in October, I'll be doing my annual meditation party
1:46.2	retreat with my friend Sebenace Salasi and Jeff Warren. It's a weekend thing at the Omega
1:50.9	Institute in upstate New York. It's really fun. We teach a bunch of different styles of meditation.
1:56.0	There's also time for Q&A and socializing and pickleball if you're into that kind of thing, your meditation practice
2:02.6	really can be improved by doing it in the carpool lane. So come hang with us. I'll put links
2:08.6	to both of those events in the show notes. And we will get started with Rosa Lewis right after this.
2:15.7	Most small business owners I know, and I would include myself in this category, lie awake running through mental to-do lists.
	...

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