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Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

How to Make Up After a Fight: The Art of Repair in Strong Relationships | E469

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

YAP Media Network | Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Relationships, Society & Culture, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.7890 Ratings

🗓️ 4 September 2025

⏱️ 51 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Have you ever had a blow-up with your partner and then sat in that heavy silence wondering what to do next? This episode is your guide to how to make up after a fight—and the real skill that keeps love strong: repair. Happy couples don’t avoid conflict; they learn how to come back to each other with intention, humility, and care. We’ll look at why “never go to bed angry” is a myth (your brain actually needs space to calm down), how self-reflection helps you share your feelings without blame, and why small repair bids—like saying, “Yesterday was rough, can we talk tomorrow?”—can open the door to understanding. I’ll also share ways to use your couple strengths, whether it’s touch, shared rituals, or humor, to restore warmth and connection. Repair takes practice, and each attempt adds another layer of strength to your relationship. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Introduction: How to Make Up After a Fight 02:00 Why Relationship Repair Matters 06:07 The Anatomy of a Repair Attempt 12:07 Repairing After a Bad Fight 21:05 Communicating Effectively With Your Partner 28:07 Using Strengths to Reconnect 37:12 Humility, Growth, and Mindset Shifts 41:08 Free Resources & Next Steps Reflect with me: 🌱 When do you know it’s time to pause instead of pushing through? 🌱 What do you wish your partner understood about your feelings in that moment? 🌱 Which strengths could you lean on to reconnect after hard moments? Want more support as you practice these skills? My Free Communication That Connects Masterclass gives you tools to shift out of conflict loops and into conversations that bring you closer, along with a workbook to help you put them into practice. You can also take my How Healthy Is Your Relationship? Quiz for a clear picture of what’s working and what needs care. I’d love to stay connected beyond the podcast. Join me on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube, where I share more tools to help you grow together. And if this episode sparked a question or idea you’d like me to explore in the future, I’d love to hear from you—let’s talk! I'd also like to give a very special thank you to the sponsor of today’s episode: Headway. I love reading and learning, but finding the time to sit down with a book can feel impossible. That’s why I’m such a fan of the Headway app. I use it almost every day, and it’s been a true game-changer for my personal growth. With Headway, I’m able to absorb the key insights from incredible books in minutes, instead of weeks. If you want to keep learning and growing right alongside me, I have an exclusive offer for you! Save 25% when you go to ⁠makeheadway.com/lhs⁠ and use the promo code LHS. Let’s keep learning and growing together. 🌱 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby Growing Self

Transcript

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0:00.0

So you had a fight, maybe a bad fight.

0:04.2

Regrettable things were said.

0:06.5

Feelings were hurt, right?

0:08.4

We cannot take that back.

0:10.6

Or maybe things have just been feeling consistently hard.

0:14.7

Maybe there was not one dramatic fight or event, but it's just been feeling very difficult between the two of you lately.

0:24.1

And now you don't even know what to do.

0:27.6

What you choose to do in that moment after the fight, after the disconnect, after the hard moments,

0:35.6

what you do, that is the story of your relationship. Because the couples who make it,

0:43.5

the ones who have strong, satisfying relationships, they do not avoid conflict. They do not

0:49.9

not go through rough batches like the rest of us, they just get really, really good at relationship

0:57.7

repair. I am so glad that you're here with me today for this episode of love, happiness,

1:04.0

and success. I'm your host, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, my background. I am duly licensed as a psychologist and I'm also a licensed

1:12.8

marriage and family therapist who specializes in evidence-based coaching psychology, believe it or not.

1:20.8

I am a professional therapist, but I'm also a board certified coach. And that's why on this show,

1:26.5

we're always talking about actionable things and

1:30.5

what you, we can all do to create better outcomes in our relationships and our lives and our

1:38.2

careers. And I'm so glad you're here with me today. If we're not yet friends on Instagram,

1:43.9

come track me down so we can keep in touch over there.

1:46.7

At Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby.

1:49.0

And also stop what you're doing right now

1:51.4

and subscribe.

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