How To Kill A Vampire... With GCSE Science!

Teach Me A Lesson with Greg James and Bella Mackie

BBC

Education

4.8 • 957 Ratings

🗓️ 27 June 2022

⏱️ 48 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Award-winning Miss Jethmalani recruits Greg and Bella to her vampire slaying research team! What's the best way to kill a vampire - with a string of garlic, or with a GCSE Science textbook?

Outstanding New Teacher of the Year 2021, Miss Jethmalani is perfectly placed to put the nail in the coffin of the vampire myth. With new recruits Greg and Bella by her side, she'll use the science of enzymes to take apart the myth of the vampire piece by piece. Why is it impossible to be immortal? Enzymes. Why do bodies decompose? Enzymes. What makes garlic smell? Enzymes! After investigating vampire bats, and just how possible it would be for a human to turn into a bat, Miss Jethmalani will discuss the most plausible root of the myth - a condition called porphyria - which is caused by malfunctioning enzymes (of course!).

Bad students of all ages are welcome. Expect brilliant teachers, captivating subjects but absolutely no homework.

Get in touch with your pictures - email us at teachme@bbc.co.uk

Transcript

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0:00.0	BBC Sounds, music radio podcasts.
0:05.0	By the end of this podcast, we're going to answer the question,
0:08.0	Can we really kill a vampire?
0:10.0	I'm Bela Mackey.
0:12.0	And I'm Greg James, and welcome to the only hour of the week at the moment where we actually interact with each other.
0:18.0	It's our date isn't it? It is. weekly date. where we invite brilliant teachers from across the UK to teach us their favorite lesson.
0:35.0	Now we're sat here today and I'm slightly wondering if we should have saved this science lesson for Halloween.
0:40.0	Today's podcast is about how to kill a vampire.
0:44.0	I'm interested, but also, vampires aren't real.
0:47.0	I felt like we should say that up front.
0:49.0	Well, yes.
0:50.0	However, you had a go at me the other day for saying that ghosts weren't real?
0:53.6	No, I said I'm really bored by bros who are like, I'm an atheist and like God, God isn't real and
1:00.8	ghosts aren't real and like science bitch like those people.
1:04.4	I'm really sorry to have written that in your birthday card.
1:06.8	Our teacher today is the Miss Jet Malani who won outstanding new teacher of the
1:18.8	year at the National Teaching Awards in 2021. Miss Jet Malani, welcome to teach me a lesson.
1:24.7	Hi guys, I'm so happy to be here. I don't want to dampen it a little bit but it is now
1:28.6	2022. So you're not the current? No, I've got a shiny little plaque in my living room that I'm very proud of and then I'm just you know hoping to win another time round.
1:37.6	You will however I guess you can't win outstanding new Teacher of the Year Award twice.
1:42.0	No I'll be outstanding old teacher.
1:44.0	The Outstanding Almost Retired Teacher.
	...

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