When you are pioneering anything or introducing new ideas to the culture, you get

criticized. You do? Yeah, did you hear about that? I didn't find the one.

I found someone I respected, and we made it the one.

In the sort of longing kind of view of love,

people understand each other as if by magic.

Nothing itself is addictive on one hand.

And on the other hand, everything could be addictive

if there's an emptiness in that person that needs to be filled.

I now know that nobody changes until they change their energy and when you change your energy you change your life.

I'm Gwyneth Peltro. This is the Goop, bringing together thought leaders, culture

changers, creatives, founders and CEOs, scientists, doctors, healers, and

seekers. Here to start conversations, because simply asking questions and listening

has the power to change the way we see the world.

Here we go.

Charles DuHigg is a Pulitzer Pulitzer Prize winning journalist and the best-selling author of The Power of Habit.

His new book is called Super Communications, How to Unlock the secret language of connection.

I just read it and I found it really fascinating and helpful for reframing how we approach different types of conversations.

Today Charles is sharing the art and science behind meaningful communication what makes certain conversations work and how we can have better, deeper conversations when we move ourselves away from reactivity and into vulnerability.

He shares a few tools for approaching difficult conversations, especially when people

seem intractable, and his advice for those who dread small talk like I do. Let's cut to my chat with

Charles Dogh. So tell me a little bit about how communication, I mean I've read the book so I know but well that's very nice of you.

It's great and to be honest it's so, like I was dealing with a difficult situation, you know, where I just kept being kind of at loggerheads with a particular person, and I was like, what the fuck?

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