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10% Happier with Dan Harris

How To Handle Dilemmas, Drift, Indecision, and Difficult People | Gretchen Rubin

10% Happier with Dan Harris

10% Media, LLC

Dan Harris, Health & Fitness, Mindfulness, Dharma, Mental Health, Meditation

4.612.2K Ratings

🗓️ 6 August 2025

⏱️ 64 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

An avalanche of practical advice and brief (but powerful) life lessons.

 

Gretchen Rubin is a New York Times bestselling author and happiness expert who explores human nature and habits. She’s a highly acclaimed writer, host of the podcast  Happier with Gretchen Rubin and the founder of the award-winning Happier app

 

In this episode we talk about:

  • What aphorisms are, and why they’re useful 
  • How to make decisions that lead to a “bigger life"
  • Why you should pay special attention to anything you lie about or hide 
  • The argument against task-sharing 
  • The dangers of being indecisive 
  • Why offering emotional validation can often be more powerful than offering solutions
  • Why you should pay close attention when people repeat themselves over and over
  • And much more



Related Episodes:

 

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Additional Resources: 

 

Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here.

 

To advertise on the show, contact [email protected] or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

 

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

This is the 10% Happier Podcast. I'm Dan Harris.

0:07.7

Hello, my fellow suffering beings, how we doing?

0:21.8

I say this all the time, but it bears repeating.

0:25.1

One of the hardest parts about self-improvement or getting happier or spiritual growth,

0:29.2

whatever you want to call it, one of the hardest parts is remembering to do all the smart

0:33.5

shit you hear about on podcasts or read about in books, remembering to actually do all that

0:39.3

stuff because we listen to a podcast or we watch a great video or we read a great book.

0:46.5

And then we go back into our lives and we're just, you know, drifting along on the very

0:50.4

powerful habit patterns. I suspect you might relate to this. You get your mind blown by a

0:55.9

scintillating conversation or a fascinating read, but then you get sucked back into the habit

1:00.3

patterns of daily life and boom, the wisdom evaporates. In my experience, one of the best ways to

1:05.4

counteract this is to have memorable little phrases that capture the wisdom and pop it into your mind just at the moment when you need it.

1:15.4

This is a technique that my longtime meditation teacher, Joseph Goldstein, uses.

1:19.5

He has these little catchphrases like dead end or is this useful.

1:23.7

And they become earworms in the most positive sense of that term.

1:26.9

They arise in my mind often at exactly the right moment.

1:32.7

So now comes my old friend, Gretchen Rubin, who's an author and podcaster and entrepreneur,

1:37.9

and she's been on the show a million times, and she's got a new book filled with her own

1:41.5

aphorisms.

1:43.1

In other words, little happiness-inducing missiles that you can use in all aspects of your life.

1:47.4

When you're confronting a dilemma, when you're dealing with a difficult person, when you're

1:50.6

experiencing drift or indecision, long way of saying, brace yourself for an avalanche of practical

...

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