How to Get Through to Your Partner | E338

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

YAP Media Network | Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Mental Health, Society & Culture, Health & Fitness, Relationships

4.7 • 890 Ratings

🗓️ 27 February 2023

⏱️ 57 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

“My husband doesn’t listen to me. He just tells me whatever he thinks I want to hear so that I’ll go away and leave him alone.” “I’m sick of not being heard in my relationship. Whenever I try to have a conversation about a problem we’re having, she just waits until it’s her turn to talk so she can tell me I’m wrong.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard complaints like these from new arrivals to couples counseling. It’s no secret that “listening to each other” is a vital skill for healthy relationships, and it certainly sounds simple enough. Yet so many of us go wrong here. Something about the way we communicate, especially during important conversations with the people we love, leaves one partner feeling unheard and the other feeling confused and defensive. When you can’t get through to your partner, it can feel like there’s no path forward, leaving you both feeling stuck and dissatisfied. But there are some little-known principles of communication that will help you get through to your partner and overcome communication blocks in any relationship. In today’s episode, we’re sharing them with you. My guest is Jennifer C., a marriage and family therapist on our team at Growing Self who has helped so many couples overcome this frustrating issue. We’re discussing the reasons you don’t feel listened to in your relationship, and some tips that will help you both feel heard (spoiler: Getting progressively louder is not the solution!). I hope you’ll check it out. With love, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com P.S. — If you’d like more content on strengthening your relationship through effective communication, check out our “communication that connects” collection of podcast episodes and articles.

Transcript

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0:00.0	This is Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, and you're listening to the love, happiness, and success podcast.
0:07.9	Is communication one of the biggest challenges in your relationship? If so, I'm glad you're here today.
0:15.1	We're talking about how to get through to your partner and achieve communication that connects.
0:34.8	My friends were listening to the band Lebanon Hangover.
0:40.1	The song is called Broken Characters from their album, besides the Abyss.
0:45.5	But they have so much good stuff.
0:48.4	Other amazing albums, Tomb 4-2 and Sci-Fi Sky have been on repeat lately at my house, and I would strongly encourage
0:56.2	you to check them out as well.
0:58.4	Lebanon hangover.bancamp.com if you'd like to learn more about them, and also check out their
1:04.0	upcoming tour dates.
1:05.0	If you are lucky enough to be bopping around Europe, you too can hang out with Lebanon hangover in the flesh. So if you do,
1:14.0	send me pictures, please, so I can live vicariously through you. And I chose this particular
1:18.8	song of theirs for us today because I thought it went so well and set the mood for our topic,
1:24.1	which is how to get through to your partner. If you listen to this song, you're
1:28.9	probably hearing love, longing, hope, despair, frustration, appreciation, all wrapped into
1:35.8	one. And that is what this experience kind of feels like, doesn't it? When you want so much
1:42.5	to get through to your partner, to be understood,
1:45.6	to have them understand. And it's feeling hard. And that's where we're going today.
1:51.3	My guest today is my dear friend and colleague, Jennifer. Jennifer is on our team here at
1:58.4	Growing Self-Counseling and Co coaching. She's a marriage and family therapist.
2:01.9	She is a relationship coach. She's a premarital counselor. And she knows a little bit about
2:08.6	communication and most specifically the kind of communication. What to say, what not to say,
	...

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