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The Double Win

How to Defuse Conflict Before It Begins

The Double Win

Michael Hyatt

Management, Intentionality, Selfdevelopment, Education, Teamleadership, Personaldevelopment, Productivity, Self-improvement, Business, Achievement, Influence, Selfleadership, Leadership

4.81.5K Ratings

🗓️ 11 February 2020

⏱️ 40 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

We don’t know anybody who loves interpersonal conflict. It’s uncomfortable, and it brings up a ton of negative emotions. Most of us try to avoid conflict whenever possible. Even as a leader, you may wonder, “Do I really have to have this hard conversation?” Here’s some good news. Conflict can actually be an opportunity for growth, not just a problem to solve. That happens when you learn how to engage with others—not just attack or defend. Based on a lifetime of dealing with difficult situations, we’ve identified five steps to help you face up to conflict.  Try this! You’ll instantly untangle that knot in your stomach and see how a hard conversation can become a win for you and for others. Best of all, you’ll have another solid tool in your leadership toolbox.  In this episode you will— Learn what it means to “hold space” for others, a key listening skill.  Gain practical tips for having difficult conversations.  Identify the one reaction that will both disarm conflict and redeem your relationship with the other person.  Understand when it’s best to speak and when to listen.  Gain the confidence to lead through initiating tough conversations.  Once you’ve listened to this episode, here’s your next step. Think about the last time someone came to you with a complaint or problem about your leadership. Identify the ways you might have responded better using these five steps. You’ll grow as a leader! Be a Pal Do you know someone who could benefit from this topic? We’ll bet you do. Everybody hates conflict! Drop a link to this episode in your favorite social media channel, and tag your peeps. They’ll thank you for it! Include the hashtag #leadtowin. Resources from This Episode Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin  This episode of Lead to Win is brought to you by The Focused Leader 1-Day Intensive to focus your achievement with clear goals and smarter productivity. Find out more at leadto.win/focusedleader. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript

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0:00.0

This episode of Lead to Win is brought to you by The Focus Leader One Day Intensive.

0:06.0

Focus your achievement with clear goals and smarter productivity.

0:10.0

Find out more at lead to that win slash focused leader.

0:17.0

Hi I'm Michael Hyatt

0:18.0

and I'm Megan Hyatt Miller

0:20.0

and this is lead to win our weekly podcast to help you win at work and succeed at life.

0:25.2

Today we're going to tackle a problem that lots of leaders face and most of us try to avoid.

0:30.6

Conflict. conflict.

0:38.0

It's really true. This is so hard and it can feel like there's always some kind of conflict that's just simmering under the

0:43.9

surface at work and home and the truth is if we're honest most of us don't feel like

0:48.5

we're any good at handling it right? No that's why we avoid it. Right.

0:53.0

And then when we do face it, it's almost like there's nothing we can do to get past our own

0:58.2

instinct to be defensive, which just sets off a whole chain of events

1:01.9

and it goes from bad to worse.

1:03.0

I almost feel like we sometimes go on an automatic pilot.

1:05.9

You know, we've had these patterns for years and probably generations if we look back at it

1:10.2

on how we handle conflict.

1:12.2

And my wife and I were talking today

1:14.4

about this very thing about a couple that we know

1:17.4

and just about how they handle conflict in their family.

1:21.4

And right in front of mom mom they were going through this major

1:23.6

conflict but with no seeming self-awareness about how they were responding to each

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