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TED Talks Daily

How to connect with depressed friends | Bill Bernat

TED Talks Daily

TED

Creativity, Ted Podcast, Ted Talks Daily, Business, Design, Inspiration, Society & Culture, Science, Technology, Education, Tech Demo, Ted Talks, Ted, Entertainment, Tedtalks

4.111.9K Ratings

🗓️ 2 March 2018

⏱️ 13 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Want to connect with a depressed friend but not sure how to relate to them? Comedian and storyteller Bill Bernat has a few suggestions. Learn some dos and don'ts for talking to people living with depression -- and handle your next conversation with grace and, maybe, a bit of humor.

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Transcript

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0:00.0

This TED Talk features storyteller Bill Burnett recorded live at TEDx Snow Isle Libraries 2017.

0:09.0

The one conversation that uplifted me more than any other in my life was with a woman who told me

0:17.2

how a few days earlier she drove her Jeep Wrangler to the edge of the Grand Canyon and sat

0:24.2

there revving the engine, thinking about driving over. Even though I had severe social anxiety,

0:32.3

in that conversation, I was totally at ease. She told me what was going on in her life in the days and months leading up what her thoughts were at that exact moment, why she wanted to die and why she didn't do it.

0:47.0

We nodded and half smiled.

0:49.4

And then it was my turn to talk about my journey to a dining table in the hygienic community area

0:57.1

of the mental health wing of a Mountain Town Hospital.

1:01.1

I took too many sleeping pills, and after they treated me for that, they were like,

1:05.7

hey, we would love it if you would be our guest in the psych ward.

1:16.9

We joked that her suicide would have made a way better postcard.

1:23.0

We talked shop.

1:26.2

She allowed me to be deeply depressed and have a genuine connection to another person simultaneously.

1:34.3

For the first time, I identified as somebody living with depression, and I felt good about it.

1:40.7

Like, I wasn't a bad person for it.

1:43.8

Now, imagine one of the people at that table

1:46.0

was a member of your family or a close friend.

1:49.0

Would you be comfortable talking to them?

1:52.0

What if instead of the hospital

1:54.0

they were at your kitchen table and told you they were really depressed?

1:58.0

The World Health Organization says that depression is the leading cause of ill health and disability

2:06.8

worldwide, affecting 350 million people.

...

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