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How to Age Up

How To Build a Happy Life: The Complexities of Human Love

How to Age Up

The Atlantic Monthly Group, LLC

Education, Social Sciences, Science, Society & Culture, Self-improvement

4.01.4K Ratings

🗓️ 17 October 2022

⏱️ 28 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Dating apps show us what we want—a relationship—without always accurately reflecting the experience of it. Our expectation that tech will create anything more than opportunities for social connectedness may overlook the hard work of coexisting with another human being. A conversation with University of Kansas social psychologist Omri Gillath helps us parse the divide between what tech promises and how it satisfies our emotional needs. This episode was produced by Rebecca Rashid and is hosted by Arthur Brooks. Editing by A.C. Valdez and Claudine Ebeid. Fact-check by Ena Alvarado. Engineering by Matthew Simonson. Be part of How to Build a Happy Life. Write to us at howtopodcast@theatlantic.com. To support this podcast, and get unlimited access to all of The Atlantic’s journalism, become a subscriber. Music by Flix (“Saturdays”), Mindme (“Anxiety”), John Utah (“A Walk on the Mile”), and Yomoti (“Nebula”). Click here to listen to more full-length episodes in The Atlantic’s How To series. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

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0:04.0

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0:07.0

and you have to go in search of your creative spark again.

0:10.0

Maybe this is catching up with creative friends,

0:13.0

experimenting with a new look or trying out a new recipe

0:16.0

and thanks to the Sims, inspiration is just one game and one spark away.

0:21.0

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0:23.0

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0:30.0

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0:41.0

your words put on repeat.

0:43.0

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0:47.0

Arthur, the real reason I don't use dating apps

0:52.0

is because I don't want to go about my love life

0:55.0

and the same way I do playing wordle or some game on my phone.

1:00.0

It's just, it's weird to me.

1:02.0

You don't want to use the same technology that you would

1:05.0

for goofing around while waiting for the bus

1:07.0

that you do to find your actual life partner

1:09.0

because it seems so incredibly important to you.

1:11.0

Why would you reduce the selection of, or at least the initial selection

1:15.0

of somebody who might turn into your life partner

1:17.0

to the same technology that comes

...

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