One of the myths I want very much to eradicate from the face of the earth is the idea that if you have to talk about sex in your relationship, there must be something wrong.

The couples who sustain a strong sexual connection over the long term talk about sex all the time. The people who self-identify

as having extraordinary sex lives, having magnificent sex, they talk about

sex with their sex partners all the time. Because anything that really matters to you,

you talk about it with other people.

You talk about it with the people you do it with.

If you're involved in theater, you talk about the theater.

If you're involved in sports, you talk about the sport. If you are a food sports, you talk about the sport.

If you are a foodie, you talk about food.

If sex matters to you in your relationship,

you talk about it.

So pleasure and intimacy with a partner are beautiful and desirable, enjoyable, and arguably

even wildly important parts of life, yet so many of us have so much trouble acknowledging

this, let alone sharing what gives us pleasure and then

asking for it. So what's going on there and what can we do about it? Life gets in the way

kids, job, stress, trauma,med the flames of desire and connection and

intimacy, the exhilarating butterflies he felt at the start of the relationship, they seemed

like a distant memory. You really yearn to reclaim that intimate sexual vitality but how it often feels

like an impossible task and by the way if you're feeling this you are so not

alone it's a huge issue but nobody talks about it for all sorts of issues from moral

patterning to fear of being judged. But what if it didn't have to be that way? What if, despite

all the challenges, you could nurture lasting intimate bonds overflowing

...