How To Both Love AND Guide Your Kids - Implementing Occam's Razor in Parenting

The Virtual Couch

Tony Overbay LMFT

Education, Mental Health, Health & Fitness, Self-improvement

5 • 643 Ratings

🗓️ 11 May 2021

⏱️ 35 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Occam's razor is the theory that given a choice between two hypotheses, the one involving fewer assumptions should be preferred. So why do we unconsciously and often unnecessarily complicate things that we desperately want to get right, like parenting? Tony takes a look at how understanding Occam's razor in the context of parenting gives us the permission to do what so many of us are trying to do in a variety of ways...love our kids! Tony refers to Tania Lombrozo, Ph.D.'s article "Choosing the Best Explanation Is Elementary, My Dear Watson" from Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/explananda/201201/choosing-the-best-explanation-is-elementary-my-dear-watson (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/explananda/201201/choosing-the-best-explanation-is-elementary-my-dear-watson) Please subscribe to The Virtual Couch YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/c/TheVirtualCouchPodcast/ (https://www.youtube.com/c/TheVirtualCouchPodcast/) and follow The Virtual Couch on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/virtualcouch/ (https://www.instagram.com/virtualcouch/) This episode of The Virtual Couch is sponsored by http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch (http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch) With the continuing “sheltering” rules that are spreading across the country PLEASE do not think that you can’t continue or begin therapy now. http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch (http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch) can put you quickly in touch with licensed mental health professionals who can meet through text, email, or videoconference often as soon as 24-48 hours. And if you use the link http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch (http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch) you will receive 10% off your first month of services. Please make your own mental health a priority, http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch (http://betterhelp.com/virtualcouch)offers affordable counseling, and they even have sliding scale options if your budget is tight. Tony's FREE parenting course, “Tips For Parenting Positively Even In the Not So Positive Times” is available NOW. Just go to https://www.tonyoverbay.com/courses-2/ (https://www.tonyoverbay.com/courses-2/)and sign up today. This course will help you understand why it can be so difficult to communicate with and understand your children. You’ll learn how to keep your buttons hidden, how to genuinely give praise that will truly build inner wealth in your child, teen, or even in your adult children, and you’ll learn how to move from being “the punisher” to being someone your children will want to go to when they need help.Tony's new best-selling book "He's a Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions" is now available on Kindle. https://amzn.to/38mauBoTony Overbay, is the co-author of "He's a Porn Addict...Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions" now available on Amazon https://amzn.to/33fk0U4 (https://amzn.to/33fk0U4). The book debuted in the number 1 spot in the Sexual Health Recovery category and remains there as the time of this record. The book has received numerous positive reviews from professionals in the mental health and recovery fields.You can learn more about Tony's pornography recovery program The Path Back by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com (http://pathbackrecovery.com) And visit http://tonyoverbay.com (http://tonyoverbay.com) and sign up to receive updates on upcoming programs, and podcasts.Tony mentioned a product that he used to take out all of the "uh's" and "um's" that, in his words,

Transcript

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0:00.0	So every now and again, I have a confession to make. I get caught going down a rabbit hole of videos on YouTube. And I was never much of a YouTube guy until just a couple of years ago. But now that I'm just sucked in, that doggone algorithm has got me. So when I want to zone out, I love watching dogfail videos. And I joke about it, but it's true. And as a matter of fact, almost nightly, I put my
0:21.6	camera on slow-mo and I toss a dog treat to my Australian Shepherd Kobe, simply because he tries
0:26.5	so hard to catch the treat. Bless his little heart, but more often than not, he misses it. We're
0:30.6	talking biting air. And then I send that video to a family group chat. Nobody ever responds. I think they're kind of tired of it by now, but I love it. And as a matter of fact, I'll probably try to have one of those videos up on my
0:40.5	virtual couch Instagram account by the time this episode airs. But apparently that algorithm
0:45.7	with that in mind tells me that people who typically like dogfail videos like myself also
0:50.7	like videos of kids getting caught red-handed and denying what they're doing. A prime
0:55.0	example is maybe a kid gets caught with chocolate all over their mouth or their hands, but they
0:59.4	insist that they did not eat the brownie or the cookie. And I love that stuff. It makes me laugh
1:04.0	every time. My kids all know that one of my favorite shows of all time is America's Funniest
1:08.4	home videos because I just, I laugh. I love those those videos.
1:12.4	But what was funny when one was a kid, unfortunately often still occurs into adulthood.
1:18.7	So I work with people who have theoretical chocolate on their faces in a session and their spouse
1:24.6	knows it, yet the offending spouse still denies it. And that's a
1:28.9	podcast for another day. Maybe an updated one on gaslighting is I've discovered some very
1:33.3	fascinating information on gaslighting as a childhood defense mechanism. And from that
1:37.8	standpoint, it makes sense that it's often carried into adulthood. But I digress. I've also
1:42.3	started a couple of notes on potential podcast episodes
1:45.3	of wanting to talk about a term called Occam's Razor. And maybe you've heard, maybe you've
1:51.0	heard of Occam's Razor. If you haven't, Occam's Razor is a principle borrowed from philosophy
1:55.4	and simply put, let's just say that there are two possible explanations for something. The explanation that requires the fewest assumptions is usually correct.
2:04.6	So let's go back to that little adorable kid with brownie all over their face.
	...

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