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Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

How To Be a Better Communicator | Charles Duhigg | E440

Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

YAP Media Network | Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Mental Health, Society & Culture, Health & Fitness, Relationships

4.7 • 890 Ratings

🗓️ 3 February 2025

⏱️ 38 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What if the secret to transforming your relationships wasn’t about saying more, but saying it better?  I know how hard it can be when communication in your relationship just isn’t working. Those moments when you’re trying so hard to connect, but it feels like you’re speaking two different languages—they’re exhausting and heartbreaking. I’ve seen so many people struggling with this, and I want you to know it doesn’t have to be this way! This week on the Love, Happiness, and Success podcast, I sat down with Charles Duhigg, New York Times bestselling author of Supercommunicators, to dive into how to be a better communicator. We talk about the importance of knowing what kind of conversations you’re having, how to ask better questions to unlock deeper connections, and steps to actually hearing and understanding each other.  Whether you’re trying to connect with a partner, a friend, or even a coworker, this conversation is packed with eye-opening insights and actionable tips to help you truly get and be gotten. Chapters: 00:00 - Why communication is the ultimate relationship glue 00:35 - Meet Charles Duhigg, your new favorite communication guru 07:38 - Game-changing tips to up your communication game 08:57 - The art of asking deep, meaningful questions 17:31 - What really works in tough conversations 28:30 - Identifying what people really need from you 31:58 - Building trust through listening and understanding 36:02 - Redefining the goal of conversations 37:49 - Resources for communication skill building My favorite takeaway from this episode was that you don’t have to be born a “supercommunicator.” These are skills that you can learn and improve with practice. So if you’re thinking “Heck yes! I’m ready for some growth!”, check out my free Communication That Connects 2-Part Training. It’s a step-by-step guide to help you understand what’s really going on beneath the disconnect, and how to rebuild the trust and emotional safety that can get lost along the way. Together, we’ll explore tools and strategies to stop the cycle of conflict, restore your connection, and start creating a more positive chapter for your relationships. Also, let’s connect on Instagram or YouTube! I go live every Thursday at 12pm MT on both platforms, diving deeper into topics just like this one and answering all of your personal questions. So check out this episode, and then come chat with me! I’m here to help. 🩵 Xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby P.S. Know someone who could use this guidance? Maybe a partner or a bestie struggling to communicate? Share this with them! Because better communication makes the world (and your group chats) a much better place.

Transcript

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0:00.0

The goal is not to agree with each other.

0:02.8

It's to walk away from the conversation understanding each other.

0:10.0

When relationships are going sideways, how do we feel in each other's presence?

0:16.9

Do we feel heard, respected?

0:19.6

Okay, I want to figure out what kind of conversation is happening here.

0:22.3

And the answer is that we oftentimes can figure out what's going on in a conversation by asking questions.

0:29.3

I am beyond thrilled to chat today with Charles Duhigg.

0:34.8

He's a New York Times best-selling author of multiple books, including

0:39.6

Super Communicators, and he's here to share what really goes on when our conversations derail.

0:47.4

When you can learn to diagnose what kind of conversation is happening, and you can learn to

0:52.9

match each other by either matching the person

0:55.4

you're talking to or inviting them to match you.

0:57.7

Then suddenly you can connect with basically anyone.

1:03.6

Welcome, Charles.

1:04.7

Thank you for having me.

1:05.7

This is such a treat.

1:06.6

Charles, I know you've done a lot of things.

1:09.4

I mean, you've written some very interesting books,

1:12.5

in addition to being the author of Super Communicators, which just came out this past year.

1:17.2

You have also authored The Power of Habit, which is one of my all-time faves.

1:22.9

And another book called Smarter, Faster, Better, The Secrets of Being Productive in Life and Business,

1:30.3

which I have not yet read, but which I think I need to because I want to be smarter,

...

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