How to be a Basic Autumn Bitch

Nobody Panic

Plosive, Tessa Coates and Stevie Martin

Education, Comedy, Society & Culture

4.8 • 933 Ratings

🗓️ 24 October 2023

⏱️ 32 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

The internet sneers at no one quite as hard as they sneer at the autumn basic bitches. BUT! After much thought, Stevie and Tessa have decided to come out to bat for them HARD. It’s decorative gourd season motherfucker, get a yourself a massive cable knit sweater and get involved!

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Recorded and edited by Aniya Das for Plosive.

Photos by Marco Vittur, jingle by David Dobson.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Happy your turn, welcome to fall, Happy autumn.
0:13.0	Welcome to fall.
0:14.0	Welcome to autumn.
0:16.0	Okay.
0:18.0	The changing of the colors.
0:19.0	Pumpkin spice.
0:21.0	Gourds.
0:22.0	The weather's turning. Decorative gourds. More gourds. The weather's turning. Decorative
0:23.1	gourds. More gods. Thanksgiving. Oh look at the trees, the color of the
0:29.2	trees, that's my favorite type of tree color. Okay. Welcome it's welcome to how to be a basic autumn bitch? A basic autumn bitch.
0:41.5	Or as Tesser typode yeah let's do autumn botch tomorrow
0:46.8	so welcome autumn batches welcome I didn't have anything autumnal so this is why
0:51.4	I'm holding this large hamper.
0:53.7	And what have you got there on your shoulder?
0:55.7	Oh this just an orange coat bag full of flower.
1:00.5	Perfect and your glasses of course which famously we all wear and think, and we've got a number of decorative gourds.
1:06.7	And Tom Kerridge's pub kitchen, just the closest orange thing we could find in the office.
1:11.3	Oh, and I'm wearing this jumper but as it. Cozy scarf. Because it's autumn.
1:15.3	Bitches. And because crucially I've noticed there's been a real turn in the last 10 years, the last decade of Loving Autumn is now sort of seen as lame.
1:25.0	Yes and why it's so mean. It's so mean. I really want someone to write a deep dive into it.
1:30.0	Oh you know what? It is? It's the Girl Boss feminism era that was like in the 2010s that was all like
1:35.9	if you wear a t-shirt that says like yeah bitch that means that you're
	...

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