How to Be a Bad Mom

Unladylike

Unladylike Media

Society & Culture, Body Politics, Media Analysis, Feminism, Beauty Standards, Cultural Commentary, Gender, Womens Rights, Internet Culture, Personal Journals, Patriarchy, Intersectionality, Philosophy, Comedy

4.8 • 3.7K Ratings

🗓️ 24 July 2018

⏱️ 46 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Moms aren't supposed to admit it, but loving your kids can also come with not loving--and possibly regretting--becoming a parent at all. Caroline and Cristen explore this taboo territory and its maternal instinct mythology with help from a couple bad mother-disruptors who are figuring out what motherhood means on their own terms. Pre-order Unladylike: A Field Guide to Smashing the Patriarchy and Claiming Your Space at unladylike.co. Follow Unladylike on social @unladylikemedia. Sign up for our newsletter at unladylike.co/newsletter. Hear our brand new exclusive bonus episode that goes behind the scenes on the Unladylike theme song on Stitcher Premium! Use promo code "UNLADYLIKE" at stitcher.com/premium for a free month trial. This episode is brought to you by Beyond Meat [http://beyondmeat.com/unladylike], Stitch Fix [http://stitchfix.com/unladylike], Brooklinen [http://brooklinen.com with code UNLADYLIKE], Vrai & Oro [http://truthandgold.com/unladylike], FabFitFun [http://fabfitfun.com with code UNLADYLIKE] and The Spy Who Dumped Me [in theaters August 3]. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	So you read us an email.
0:09.0	Yes. And I was wondering if you could read that email for us today.
0:13.0	Okay, here it goes.
0:15.0	I've been thinking lately, and your first episode on abortion made me think more,
0:19.0	about women who are mothers, but who don't want to be mothers.
0:22.0	Recently, my husband and I were in a discussion about division of household duties,
0:27.0	and he said to me, face it, you just don't want to be a mother.
0:31.0	And I indignantly replied, yes, I do. I love being a mother.
0:35.0	But somewhere in the back of my mind was the question,
0:38.0	do I really want to be a mother?
0:40.0	I have a two-year-old whom I adore, so the ship has sailed on mother I get to be a mother.
0:45.0	But do I really want to be a mother now that I am one?
0:48.0	What does it mean to be a mother in today's society?
0:51.0	If I really am as much of a feminist as I believe that I am,
0:55.0	why does it feel like one of the most damning things my husband can say to me is,
0:59.0	face it, you just don't want to be a mother.
1:19.0	Hey y'all! Welcome to Unladylike, where we find out what happens when women break the rules.
1:24.0	I'm Kristen and I'm Caroline and I got to tell you I opened our Unladylike email inbox to find that email from listener Amanda
1:34.0	describing her maternal ambivalence and I knew we had to do an episode on it.
1:40.0	It rang all of my Unladylike alarm bells. I just had to talk to her. I'm fascinated when women voice things that they are not supposed to.
1:52.0	I mean obviously that's part of what we do on Unladylike totally and expressing any degree of mixed feelings about motherhood like I made us doing is such an Unladylike taboo.
2:05.0	So when you came to me and you were like, Kristen, we got this email. I knew we had to investigate.
	...

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