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Hey guys, welcome back to We metadakney.

I'm so excited for today's episode with Jake.

It was so fun recording. He's in Australia, so the timing was hilarious. It was at like almost 10 p.m. My time.

It's just crazy that they're just like living a day ahead of us and we are just

living in the past over here. Anyway I'm going to play some of your questions your

voice questions and then we will get into the episode so let's start her start

them off quick question so for those of us who are a little bit more anxious or anxiously attached, how do you distinguish when you should reach out to your partner and ask or give positive reinforcement for a little bit more reassurance versus kind of

working on yourself and finding that reassurance. Obviously we should always be

working on ourselves and our partner should give us a fair amount of reassurance and affirmation,

but when do you distinguish when to ask for a little bit more versus it should be something

that at this point you should be able to give yourself.

This is such a good question and I feel like my answer is going to be a little controversial

which is that I don't think even if you're

anxiously attached I think when you're with someone who is securely

attached they give you that affirmation you don't really need to ask for it. And of course there are times when you could say something like, you know, when you tell me I look great in this outfit or I was such an incredible girlfriend this week or

whatever you know it makes me happy like you could say something like that here

and there but if you feel like you have to have like a sit-down

conversation with your partner to know that they still really love you, then they are not

doing a good enough job as a partner to show that to you.

I truly believe that and I know we see these Tik-Tocks all the time joking like

me asking my boyfriend for the 15th time if he still loves me and that's funny and of

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