How much makeup is too much, can mental illness fit into marriage, what if my wife won’t heal with me | ACW347
Ask Christopher West
Theology of the Body Institute
4.9 • 549 Ratings
🗓️ 27 August 2025
⏱️ 48 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Questions answered this episode:
- Five years ago I discovered Theology of the Body, and it transformed me. Since then, I’ve wrestled with balancing modesty and femininity. I’ve stopped self-tanning and wearing heavy makeup because they felt like a mask. As a single woman desiring marriage, I want to look my best but not rely on things that hide my true self. My mom says I should wear more makeup, especially on dates, which makes me feel like I’m not good enough naturally. How do I present myself beautifully and confidently without overusing makeup, and what’s the morality of cosmetics, hair dye, and tanning?
- I’ve been discerning marriage, but I don’t feel mentally healthy enough to raise children. Even if I overcome anxiety, knowing how quickly mental health can collapse makes me fear the responsibility of another life. Because of this, I’ve considered a Josephite marriage. But a sexless marriage fills me with sadness, partly because it reminds me of my illness. Do you have any guidance for me?
- For years I failed as a husband, hurting my wife verbally and emotionally. By God’s grace, I’ve turned around, and she’s still here, but she does little to actively seek healing for our marriage. I know the damage is my fault, yet I still feel frustrated that she isn’t more proactive—and then I beat myself up for even being frustrated. What advice do you have for a husband who caused the wounds but struggles when the one hurt won’t do more?
Resources:
List of Counselors & Psychologists
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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | From the Theology of the Body Institute, this is the Ask Christopher West podcast. |
| 0:15.6 | Welcome everybody to another episode of our podcast. |
| 0:21.5 | Yes, hi, listeners. |
| 0:23.3 | I'm happy to be with you, Wendy. |
| 0:24.7 | Thank you. |
| 0:25.4 | Thank you. |
| 0:25.8 | I'm happy to be with you. |
| 0:27.0 | Just a few minutes ago, before we hit record, we were talking about how this has been going on for a while. |
| 0:32.8 | I know that's sort of obvious. |
| 0:33.9 | We're coming up on our 350th episode. |
| 0:38.8 | What episode is this? |
| 0:40.1 | 347. |
| 0:41.0 | 347. |
| 0:41.4 | And we're coming up on seven years of doing this. |
| 0:44.8 | Oh, my goodness. |
| 0:45.9 | Yeah. |
| 0:46.2 | So then I was asking, well, what else have you done that consistently? |
| 0:50.7 | And you remembered a long time ago. |
| 0:52.9 | I remembered an inconsistency. |
| 0:55.2 | Oh, okay. |
| 0:56.5 | And if Greg Popjack is out there listening, I am so sorry. |
| 1:02.6 | I used to be on once a week with Greg Pop Jack. |
... |
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