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Welcome to the Daily Dad podcast, where we provide one lesson every single day to help you with your

most important job, being a parent. I'm Ryan Holiday, and I draw these lessons from ancient

philosophy, modern psychology, practical wisdom, and insights from parents just like you all over the world. Thank you for listening, and we hope this helps.

How do you think it feels? You were just trying to get your point across. You were just trying to

teach them. You're just trying to keep them safe. But how do you think it feels?

How do you think it feels to be them?

We talked recently about a haunting scene in Terrence Reel's must-read book, Us,

about an imperious and cold father named Steve.

Steve had struggled with empathy and with connecting to his kids

until one day, as he recounts,

he was driving his young son home from a day of fun.

When the boy started to get car sick, he had his hand up to his mouth.

Steve says he saw when he looked back over his shoulder, and God damn it, he was holding in his own vomit because he was scared of me.

Admitting all this to his therapist brought Steve to tears.

I looked at my son, at the fear in his eyes, and I was appalled.

He said, I was appalled at myself.

What Steve had in that moment was a flash of what it was like, not just to be a kid, but to be his kid,

...