The first person I told, obviously, that I was getting help was my husband.

And that was great because he was just happy about it, because he was the one that had to see me,

you know, really hung over and feeling anxiety. And he was just really, really supportive.

And from that moment on, I actually didn't tell

anybody for 18 months. I was very, very nervous about telling anybody that the fact that I'd

given up drinking, because I think the word sobriety can often, you know, it relates to the word

alcoholic. And admitting to having a problem means I was going to feel very, very judged. So actually,

I kept it a secret. I kept my therapy a secret from everybody apart from my husband until I was

comfortable to tell everybody. I think the other problem was as well for me, why I was so scared

of telling everybody, was that I just felt that I didn't want to

let anybody down. I'd told people I was giving up drinking before and I'd tried and tried

moderation and everything and failed. And this time I didn't want to fail and I didn't want to

tell, make this big, you know, announcement and then not do as well as I'd hopes. So actually, I did tell people after 18 months,

and that was one of the hardest things I ever had to do in my sobriety.

Can I just interrupt and say 18 months is a really, really long time,

a year and a half of not telling anybody other than your husband.

It was massive.

It was massive, and also I did socialise during that period.

And sometimes I sat with a beer, which I know sounds ridiculous, but I just wasn't ready.

I sat and I held a beer. I didn't sip on it. I just held onto it because I just couldn't be bothered with the questions.

For me, my sobriety journey was so personal. It was just about me, my husband and my children.

And I just didn't feel confident to tell anybody about it.

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