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Love Over Addiction

How Addiction Can Be A Blessing For Our Kids

Love Over Addiction

Michelle Anderson

Relationships, Society & Culture

4.81.5K Ratings

🗓️ 22 October 2017

⏱️ 14 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Let's be real, loving someone who drinks too much or suffers from substance abuse can feel like the opposite of a blessing.

But one of the things that make our community different is that we refuse to just talk about the dark sides of this disease. Many, many blessings come out of a complicated relationship. And today, I want to talk about one of them.

I am divorced. And I was the one who chose to leave my husband after ten years of trying to "help" him get sober. We have three children together. And one of the greatest fears that kept me suffering in my marriage was the idea that leaving would break our family apart. I was so afraid that I would do serious damage to my children.

A few years ago I was a Keynote Speaker for a Celebrate Recovery conference. I brought my oldest son, Lance who was 12 at the time to hear me speak. His response to my talk about his father made me weep.

Below is an excerpt from an email to all attendees and the entire church written by the man who ran the conference. He refers to Dr. Jerry Cade who is a wonderful guy that heads up the National Christian Counseling Association (I ended up being a Keynote from them after this talk).

I hope you find hope and see this disease really does bring blessings. Not just for you, but for your children as well. It's not all dark, and there is so much light just waiting for you. Have faith that blessings are just around the corner.
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Michelle Anderson's wonderfully titled program, Love Over Addiction, is giving wisdom to women about loving a man who suffers from substance abuse. Michelle's young son, Lance, joined her for the entire day. She mentioned Lance in her address and the fact that this was his first time ever to hear his mom speak in such a formal presentation. Dr. Cade wrote, "I happened to sit by him (Lance). Maybe it was just me, but I think that at the end of Michelle's talk, he jumped to his feet and began to applaud and led all the rest of us to a standing ovation. Love over addiction, indeed!"

No, Jerry, it wasn't just you --- I saw it, too --- a boy who, without thought of embarrassment, jumped from the pew applauding; but, it was his face I will remember - a young boy's face lit up with a righteous pride that shouted from the rooftop, "That is MY mom!!! I am HER son!!" If nothing else had happened in the entire conference but that one moment in time for that one boy, then Re-Creation lived up to its name!"

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I adore you my reader and you're an amazing mother.  I promise you that this disease will not ruin them if you communicate with your kids about what's going on.

Not sure what to tell them?  The Love Over Mistakes program discusses exactly what to say (and what NOT to say) to your children.  Join us by clicking here and find the answers you've been looking for.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

You're listening to the wife of to the podcast. My name is Michelle Lisa Anderson.

0:19.8

Actually, a lot of people get that mistaken.

0:23.0

They call me Lisa for some reason,

0:24.8

but my first name is Michelle,

0:26.2

and I'm gonna tell you a little secret.

0:28.5

So I've always gone by Michelle.

0:30.7

That's, Lisa's my middle name. And when I was starting this community seven years

0:38.3

ago, I was doing a Google search on Michelle Anderson's.

0:43.2

And there is a very well-known woman named Michelle Anderson,

0:50.8

who is also in the the how should I put this

0:56.1

adult industry adult film industry

1:00.9

I think she is anyways there was some very interesting pictures of a woman named Michelle Anderson on the internet.

1:08.0

And I thought, hmm, I'm not sure. I think I need to use my mental name. So it's Michelle the the website is

1:16.2

Michelle Lisa Anderson but a lot of people call me Lisa for some reason.

1:20.9

Anyways welcome I'm so glad you're here and joining us this week.

1:27.2

We are going to talk about an interesting subject that I know probably a lot of you are going what okay so

1:36.0

this is how addiction can be a blessing for our kids and I'm gonna try and get through

1:42.1

this episode without crying because it's a personal episode for me about my son, Lance, who is 16 right now, about to be 17, which makes me feel very old.

1:55.0

But loving someone who drinks too much or suffers from substance abuse

2:01.0

can feel like the opposite of a blessing. But one of the

2:06.9

things that makes our community different is that we refuse to talk about the dark sides of this disease.

2:16.0

I mean, we do talk about the realities,

...

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