Hot Dates: "I'm Supposed to Be Certain"
Death, Sex & Money
Slate Audio
4.6 • 7.7K Ratings
🗓️ 9 July 2018
⏱️ 9 minutes
🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS
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| 0:00.0 | A couple of friends that have approached me have asked me, Dan, why in the world did you agree to do this podcast? |
| 0:06.0 | Why did you put yourself out there? You sound like a complete idiot. Hey, it's Anna, with an update in our hot date series, this time from Dan. |
| 0:21.0 | And I told him that I'm getting out there and describing what I as a white |
| 0:26.4 | heterosexual man did and what I do now and the realizations that I've come to and |
| 0:32.3 | the lessons learned and what I'm doing. and the |
| 0:33.3 | lessons learned and what I'm doing differently. |
| 0:35.8 | Dan is the 41-year-old widower in Seattle, |
| 0:39.5 | who's back in the dating pool after his wife died last year. |
| 0:43.0 | A lot of you had strong reactions to some of the things Dan said about consent in our first interview, |
| 0:50.0 | including how he's trying to behave differently than earlier in his dating life. |
| 0:55.0 | This is what he told me in that conversation. |
| 0:58.0 | What I would have done for is I would have initiated physical contact |
| 1:02.0 | and I would have kept going and she said whoa not this I |
| 1:06.0 | simply would have switched tactics. He also told me as he's dating now after me to |
| 1:11.8 | he won't make a move at all unless he gets a clear verbal and sober yes. |
| 1:18.0 | But in a voice memo he sent afterward, he said that's been a little frustrating because he feels like the women he's |
| 1:24.3 | dating don't actually find that kind of communication attractive. |
| 1:28.5 | One of the phrases I keep hearing over and over again is I'm tired of making decisions. I want the man to make |
| 1:36.3 | decisions for a change. I called Dan up to talk about this and some of your |
| 1:41.4 | reactions to his first interview. |
| 1:44.3 | I want to read you an excerpt from an email and get your response. |
| 1:50.8 | And the listener says, Dan's interview made me want to scream. I feel like he's |
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