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Hey all. Joe here and you are listening to Under the Influence.

When I had my first baby, I completely bought into the myth that I would immediately not just fall in love, but know exactly how to be a mother.

And neither of those things were true. I had no idea what the hell I was doing with this baby.

And yes, I loved him, but it wasn't that kind of all-consuming, glowy, just angelic kind of love that culture and pretty much everyone tells us that we're

supposed to have for the baby the minute it comes out of our bodies. And even though I loved my baby,

I didn't know exactly how much I liked him because nothing was the way

that I thought it would be, and it was so, so much harder than I thought it would be.

I want to talk about that today because even though a lot of progress has been made since I had my first baby

nearly eight years ago, I still don't think that we talk about it enough. I think that motherhood

is still filtered and polished and it's still very easy to fall into that trap of thinking

...