Happy New Year! Opening the Vault

Deconversion Therapy

deconversiontherapy

Religion & Spirituality, Documentary, Religion, Comedy, Society & Culture

4.9 • 585 Ratings

🗓️ 1 January 2020

⏱️ 40 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

We're taking some time to improve the show and replaying some of our favorite episodes. Please SPONSOR us on Patreon. Thank you! We RIFF on some memories of urine and being snipers before we let you loose on an episode we released on Christmas Eve of 2018. Bonnie and Karen read their first submitted story by a listener! The subject is how Christianity shames females into thinking all sexual "sins" are their fault, even when they didn't participate! They discuss how rapey ducks can be and how it's always the female duck who is the "stumbling block" to the "thought life" of said dicks, we mean ducks. Karen recounts having to forgive a fellow missionary when he confesses he thought about her while masturbating, and Bonnie asks the question we all want to know: Was Fonzie having sex with all those girls he brought to his apartment above the Cunningham's garage on Happy Days?

Transcript

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0:00.0	Okay, hi guys. This is Bonnie and...
0:03.8	This is New Year's Karen.
0:06.4	That's right.
0:08.1	Happy New Year's.
0:10.5	I lost 40 pounds since last night.
0:14.5	New Year, New May.
0:16.2	With the magazine that you get at the grocery store that says lose 40 pounds by December 25th.
0:24.9	Like, how do they know when I'm purchasing this magazine?
0:29.3	Damn it. I got it half off on the 26th.
0:33.3	So this is a little intro that we're doing because we're going to take the next few weeks and convene Karen and I to work on story ideas and topics to bring you great stuff in the new year.
0:46.5	We're really going to be, we're going to fellowship and then.
0:52.4	As a verb.
1:00.3	Yep. And we're going to journal as a verb. Yep. And we're going to journal as a verb and come up with the best ideas and new material and we really want to bring you guys a great show. Let me tell you
1:06.5	about the word journal, can I? Yeah. Okay, so every time somebody says the word journal, it reminds me of my friend Kevin, who was in a bad state,
1:19.0	I don't know from what, in the hospital, and he had to pee in a bedpan.
1:24.4	And they called it the urinal, except the lady pronounced it with a J.
1:29.8	And she's like, do you need the journal?
1:34.4	So Kevin's aversion to the word journal has stuck with me for like, I don't know, 20 years.
1:42.7	That reminds me when I was a candy striper, which for, I know, you millennials means you got to wear a cute
1:51.1	outfit and work at the hospital.
1:54.5	And this old lady was like, hey, could you get my doctor's card for me?
2:00.0	And she, like, you know, put her hand to go,
	...

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