Hey there, Jen here, and this is a happy bit. I want to talk all about being 100% responsible for

your happiness. Now, earlier this week on the episode with Molly Goodhart, she talked about being

the captain of your own ship, not choosing to lie in the bottom of that boat and let life

take you wherever it wants, just

drifting and floating along, but instead to stand up, put your hand on the oar or that rudder

and steer that ship where you want it to go. There are various times in our lives where we

tend to let go or abdicate our responsibilities. And one of those,

I believe, for women in particular, correct me if I'm wrong, but I see this more often with women,

is when we marry and have children. Let me explain how that worked for me. When I married my

husband, I was very relieved to have someone to provide.

And with that in mind, I abdicated my responsibility to really have anything to do with our finances.

I was happy to go to Target and spend that money. But I didn't really help budget or stick to the budget

or do any of that process. So later on, when our conflict around money got too big, I had to

relearn skills I had completely let go of. Why did I do it? I don't know, but I am way

happier having those financial skills again today. Another one is when I married,

I really did believe that it was my husband's job to help make me happy and to help me feel

loved. And if I didn't feel loved or he didn't act the way I thought he

should be acting in a certain situation, I would feel hurt and sad or angry. I was abdicating my

emotional responsibility to love myself and be happy. It is our responsibility. Now, when I had kids, similar things happened.

I let go of my boundaries around self-care and I let my children completely breach those boundaries so

much so that I was exhausted and grumpy. And luckily, my mood and my body

and my exhaustion forced me to learn how to retake control of that area after a number of years

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