Haitian Zombies (Entry 561.ZC1412)

Omnibus

History, Society & Culture

4.6 • 2.7K Ratings

🗓️ 29 October 2019

⏱️ 57 minutes

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Summary

In which the origins of America's favorite 21st-century horror trope are traced back to the miseries of Caribbean plantation slavery, which is a huge bummer, and John ponders the role of squash in the afterlife. Certificate #49964.

Transcript

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0:00.0	We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick. We speak to you from our present, which we can only assume is your distant past, the turbulent time that was the early 21st century.
0:21.0	Fearing the great cataclysm that will surely befall our civilization, we began this
0:25.5	monumental reference of strange and obscure human knowledge.
0:28.8	These recordings represent our attempt to compile and preserve wonders and esoterica that would otherwise be lost.
0:35.0	So whether you're listening from an advanced civilization or have just reinvented the technology to decrypt our transmissions,
0:41.0	this is our legacy to you.
0:43.4	This is our time capsule.
0:45.4	This is the omnibus. Oh, You have accessed entry 561.
1:16.2	Z.C. that's Zulu Charlie.
1:21.6	Are we doing that? We're doing that now. Charlie. 49964. 64.
1:33.0	Haitian zombies.
1:37.0	But I don't care, darling, because I love you.
1:42.0	You've got to love you. Go!
1:43.0	You've got to let me eat your...
1:47.0	No!
1:48.0	Are you scared there or are you spooky?
1:52.0	Are you scaring others or are you a little
1:54.3	unnerved by the prospect of Haitian zombies? I'm a little unnerved. These are the real
1:58.4	zombies. These are not time of the season British invasion zombies. Right.
2:03.0	They're not zombies that are like in a mall.
2:05.0	Right, they're not mall zombies.
2:07.0	They're not consumer zombies.
	...

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