Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bill of Jesse Thorne. This week, gulpable negligence.

Alana brings the case against her boyfriend Carson. Carson has a stash of reusable water bottles next to his bed.

Each of them has water inside. But Carson isn't drinking that water. Alana wants the old water to go,

but Carson says, it's still drinkable. He'll drink it eventually. Who's right, who's wrong,

only one can decide. Please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom and presents an obscure cultural reference.

Visionary. Genius inventor. Peacemaker, searcher, Texan, oil man, art collector, engineer,

cryptozoologist, and podcaster. Judge John Hodgman was given many labels during his short

event-filled life. But today, hardly anyone remembers this amazing individual. And that's a shame.

Bailiff, Jesse Thorne, please swear the litigants in. Alana, Carson, please rise and raise your

right hands. Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth? So help you, God or whatever. Yes. Yes, I do. Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling, despite the fact that he will only drink standing water if it is made safe by the inclusion of gin. Yes. Yes.

It's the only way we can be sure.

Newk it from orbit.

That's what I call it.

That's what I call that particular drink.

Thank you.

Alana Carson, you may be seen for an immediate summary judgment in one of your's favors.

Can either of you name the piece of culture that I paraphrasing, mostly quoted, except for a

couple of words. I'll give you a hint. It's from a book. If either of you can name it,

you win the case automatically. So, Alana, why don't you guess first? Well, sadly, my prepared

guess was come clean by Hillary Duff. So I was thinking along the lines of hygiene and

cleanliness. Sure. I don't, I don't know what book this could be. Okay. Well, it's a good guess.

I like the hygiene guess. I was not going for the hygiene angle. I'm going to give you a hint so you can make another guess if you wish. It's a different Hillary Duff song. It's not a song. And it's not about the hygiene angle. It's about the insulated tumbler angle. Now, Judge John Hodgman is not sponsored by this product, but there is a

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