Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm Bail of Jesse Thorn, where in Chambers this week clearing the docket. And with me is the judge who judges them all, Judge John Hodgman. Hi John.

Jesse Thorn, it's good to be here this week. Very special docket long, long promised or at least last couple of months promised. Grudge match. Some weeks ago, we put out a call for your old grudges.

Grade school rivalries summer camp nemices and looking at you camp robin Hood.

Chrummy cousin stealing your stuff when you were little kids. And wow, did you come back with some amazing letters and some serious beefs.

Not many of these cases Jesse are debatable.

They're a lot of sides to these stories. But there are definitely wrongs to be righted and we're going to lay down some harsh sentences.

John, you know what my top summer camp nemesis was? No.

Canoes. I just don't they're too tippy to tippy. Why am I in a lake anyway? Right. I'm a land animal. Right. And lakes are lakes are junk.

Lakes are garbage. They're full of gross seaweeds and big mouth bass. If only there were seaweeds. They're lake weeds.

Oh, yeah, the worst. And as I've pointed out, sometimes giant freshwater clams are down there in the muck.

And yeah, you're up there on the canoe and it's tipping all over the place.

I'm a city kid. Tippy canoe and Jesse too. That was that famous political motto from the past.

Archery is one thing. Archery might come in handy when I'm walking past Valencia Gardens, housing projects by my house.

Holy boy. I wish it were true that you were walking around your neighborhood in San Francisco.

It's like Hawkeye with a with a quiver of with a quiver of arrows over your and a bow strung over your shoulder.

What's that you say pocket check? How about this arrow check?

Is what I would say. Yeah, exactly. I'll tell you about Camp Robyn to the later in the episode because we got a lot of old beef to settle here.

Okay, here's a case from Crystal, in Seattle. I'm 34 years old and I'm still mad about an injustice from the first grade.

I had a gold hair clip that was so big you had to have thick long hair just to use it.

Like my hair, which was extremely thick and down to my waist. One day my classmate, Brittany, stole the clip from my desk.

I saw her with it and told our teacher. The teacher asked Brittany if she took my clip and Brittany said, no, she said she'd had that clip for a long time.

That line really brought back so many memories of kids lying.

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